Mutual Breakup: want to remain friends

[Gary5]

Me and my girlfriend of nearly 2 and a half year broke up today. In the end it was a mutual decision as we both didn't see a long term future as we were both going to university and I was going to an university exchange abroad for a year.

I am a year older than her and have already been at university a year although this wasn't really a long distance relationship as my university is fairly close to where I live and I traveled home often to see her although this still made us miss each other a lot. However, the impending changes in our circumstances, have regrettably forced us to end the relationship and we will probably see each other every couple of months at best and we decided that it would be too hard for the two of us in the long run.

Her importance in my life over the course of the last two and a half years cannot be understated. She was certainly my best friend. She was also the person I'd spend the most time with, she was always there for me and was always the person I turned to when I had problems. Therefore, this is going to be a huge change in my life. I'm absolutely devastated by this already, it hasn't properly sunk in yet either (normally it takes time for me to come to terms with bad news).

Due to her previous importance in my life, I really don't know what my life will be like without her. I still want her in my life. However, whilst I know that a relationship isn't going to work in the long run. I feel like I still need her in my life and would love for her to remain as a friend. I know she feels the same way as me with this.

I know some people might feel it is very hard to remain as friends following a breakup, but I'm sure that's what I want. I haven't got the necessary people in my life to feel her roles in my life and I enjoyed her company and companionship. People may also feel that I am being irrational with my judgments as it is very early days. However, I am sure they will not change.

I do not really know how to approach the breakup either, in the hours that followed the breakup we were texting each other to help ease our grief but it is often important to give each time and space. I really feel the urge to text her about how I feel and how sad I am right now.

I'd be extremely grateful for any advice you may have. Thank you.

[Jason2]

look good

[pisces25]

You can have a friendship but give it time. You both need time and space to process the break up. I was in your situation several years ago and am now very good friends with my ex. But it took a year or two to get to that point.

One word here, for everything you are going through right now. TIME. It will be your best friend. Good luck and feel free to post here if you need support.

[songdanceditty]

Sounds like you're handling it well. I think you'll be fine. Maybe spend some time with other platonic friends right now and work on the social part of your life instead of the romantic part. It will give you support.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You're sure that's what you want until she starts ****ing other dudes. Tell her that you'll keep in touch, but not constant contact. Maybe after a few years, you two can reconnect when things are more stable, but until then you should each try to learn and grow as much as possible on your own.