Need Some Insight..

[karablund]

My best guy friend of about 4 years and I recently became a FWB situation. It seemed to be going well.. Heres a little back story- we've been friends for years, but have become really close over the last few months. Pretty much ALL of our friends have started to assume there is something going on between us and think we should be dating.. however no one actually knows that we are hooking up.

Last weekend we went to the bars with a group of friends. He was all over another girl, but by the end of the night switched his attention to me. He was very affectionate, which was odd because we were in public. He was holding my hand and kissed me multiple times.. He was even joking around with everyone about him and I getting married.

We went back to his house and he told me that he wants a relationship and that hes insecure because he knows that I don't. He was reallllyyy drunk so the conversation wasn't too successful. We hung out all the next day and it wasn't awkward, but we didn't talk about it either. He was very affectionate all day as well.

My question is this: was it the alcohol talking? He was the one who suggested a FWB arrangement, and he has made it clear in the past he isn't looking to be in a relationship right now. We briefly talked about what he said, and he said he doesn't remember the conversation. He also said that we should only continue this relationship when sober, so things like that don't happen anymore.

I'm just looking for some outside perspective. Any thoughts are appreciated!

[HeartIsAching]

The alcohol won't put thoughts into his head. It will simply lower inhibitions.

Frankly, if he's saying FWB while sober, and relationship while drunk, he's probably got some reservations about a relationship with you. If you want a relationship, you should tell him so and tell him that the FWB arrangement is off. If you're ok with the FWB situation, then just go with it.

[TeeJay19]

I would say he wants a relationship, but maybe he's just thinks you don't which is why he never mentioned it before. Or maybe he wants a relationship but is worried it could ruin your friendship. Like HeartIsAching said, alchohol doesn't put thoughts into our heads. If anything we're more truthfull when we're drunk because we're not thinking about the consequences of what we're saying.

[bulrush]

He hit on this girl, and finally realized that he really liked you. Then he was publicly affectionate. Then he asked you for a relationship. I think he really wants a relationship. He even admitted he was scared to you, which, for guys, is a REALLY BIG deal. Guys don't admit their insecurities to just anyone. He's going out on a limb and trusting you with this information.

Do you like him enough to date him? And does he want an exclusive relationship?

[karablund]

I do like him, but I don't quite trust him enough for a relationship. So that makes things really hard...