Ex girlfriend , shall I do this?

[jcowap]

Hello.

So me and my girlfriend split on Wednesday (3 days ago). We didn't spllit because of anything either of us did. We split because she had an aboertion 10 days and and since the abortion she became very distant and wouldn't let me in at all and give the relationship a chance to recover. I planned to go No Contact and I have done however, she is out tonight with her mate drinking.

I weas thinking of texting her when she's drunk? She get's drunk VERY easilly and I know when your drunk you do crazy things and your emotions come out. She could ignore my text despite her being drunk, react in a bad way or react in a good way and start to talk.

Ideas? Thanks

[Chris0516]

Nope, It won't help the situation.

[jcowap]

Nope, It won't help the situation.

A few people have said no, others said what more harm could it do? We have already split up and not speaking.

Im just exploring all possibilities as this really is hurting! We was so perfect before - never had a better start to a relationship!

She even said 2 weeks before the abortion she was worried we wont be the same afterwards (this showed she cares) , i assured her we would be but things arn't the same and its because she didnt give the relationship a chance to be the same (I know she has her reasons and her head will be messed up so cant really blame and resent her) Just wished she'd of been honest with me and open.

Suppose the best thing to do is leave her be which is so hard! See her living her life without me!

I made her so happy and laugh loads! I cheered her up. She loved my company and when she wasn't with me she loved talking! I absolutely love her to bits! I'd of spent my life making her happy and been faithful and loyal! Her ex hit her, cheated, used her for money (she paid his car insurance) I would of been the total opposite! I just feel every girl I meet ill compare to her and she set a VERY high standard

[kdjm]

listen, texting her when you know she's drunk is just a bad idea. do it when she's sober and in a right state of mind. after a woman has an abortion, you have no idea how emotionally damaged they become. she might even need to seek professional help over this. your relationship won't be the same as it was before- how could it when you've through something so drastic together!? but that's ok! what you'll need to do if and when you get her back is to start fresh, and have a new, mature relationship with her. but remember, time heals all wounds.. and expect her to be very wounded after giving up her baby!

[jcowap]

listen, texting her when you know she's drunk is just a bad idea. do it when she's sober and in a right state of mind. after a woman has an abortion, you have no idea how emotionally damaged they become. she might even need to seek professional help over this. your relationship won't be the same as it was before- how could it when you've through something so drastic together!? but that's ok! what you'll need to do if and when you get her back is to start fresh, and have a new, mature relationship with her. but remember, time heals all wounds.. and expect her to be very wounded after giving up her baby!

Very good advice and agree with everything you say. I do need to give her time and space and if she realises how good we was together and how I am a very nice guy, she will come back.

Don't shout but I did text her. I simply said "Hi". She did text back and we talked a bit, I made her laugh and she said she hoped I was ok. I went on to say I want to be friends. That doesn't mean I am now going to bombard her with texts, Ill still give her plenty of time and space.

[nocluewhattodo]

hmmmm, breaking up just after she has had an abortion because she came distant and couldnt cope with it????????????????? of course she couldnt bloody cope with it her head is all over the place, did she have this abortion of her own free will? I think perhaps even if it was strained and had arguments (which of course it would be after having an abortion) you should have offered your support not headed for the hills. Oh and how big of you to want to befriends rather than a father to her child. how old are you anyway? 25? man up

[nocluewhattodo]

p.s. i dont think you are half the catch you seem to think you are, "she knew it wouldnt be the same afterwards" that just screems she didnt want to go through with it. i think you have done enough damage leave her alone

[jcowap]

p.s. i dont think you are half the catch you seem to think you are, "she knew it wouldnt be the same afterwards" that just screems she didnt want to go through with it. i think you have done enough damage leave her alone

Listen you absolute clueless MORON!

You dont have a clue! Strained and had arguements? Nah it wasnt strained at all and there was no arguements! Even though SHE was pregnant we got on fine!
It was 90% her decision to have an abortion you goon!! If id of wanted to keep it, she would of still aborted it!!
I would of been the father of ber child if thats what she wanted?! Dont come on on here on your high horse assuming things when you couldnt be more wrong!!
She did become very distant but claimed she was perfectly fine mentally and physically. If he claims she is ok but bocks me out, what am i supposed to do? For all i know the abortion could of affected her in no way what so ever like she claimed (which can happen to some women and i have done a hell of a lot of research!!) plus shes a very strong girl!

And read my post properly!!
I said she was WORRIED we wouldnt be the same!! I tried my best to be there for her and take her mind off things and make her laugh and i arranged to take her out for the day to cheer her up and she agreed to come out then made other plans.

What an absolute jerk!! You have made me so angry!!

[cheekxs]

abortion is something horible. was it your child? leave her alone!

[jcowap]

Obviously it was my child. I know its horrible. When did i say its not?! But she oushed me out, didnt even tell me the day she was going. What am i supposee to do? I cant be there for her when she wont let me

[jetta86s]

Sometimes the best help you can do is not to. In this case she kind of freaked out and the best thing for you to do is let it be for now. She has to realize on her own and you should wait for that to happen.I know it's hard but its the best thing you can do for now.