Help and some advice on a new gf

[Albinoni]

Hi all here. I have decided to ask this question and your help and advice here would be greatly appreciated, perhaps you have had more experience in the past with stuff like this so this is why i decided to ask this in the male forum.

Anyhow its been over a year since I broke off with my previous ex gf and life has been good and i moved on, to be honest I did quite like and enjoyd the single life style :-)

Well here is my story. About bit over two weeks ago I met a new girl, she's asian (chinese from HK but lives here in Australia) and so far we have gone out about 5 to 6 times now, mainly for coffee, drink and dinner. So far she seems a nice girl, decent and nice. Most of the times if not all the times we've been out I have paid for everything this means both the drinks, coffee and dinners.

we havent slept with each other as yet and im not after this at all because its till early stages, so far were just good friends, though Ihave held her hand when we walk together and shes ok/cool wth that. But re sex or sleeping not yet and like I said I am not going out with her just for one thing, i want to have a proper relationship with a girl, someone I can love and expect the same in return, like they say its takes two to tango.

In the past Ive been used and burn and i dont want this from re occuring again.

Now my main questions here:

1. How do I know if this girl is truly and genuine and is keen on me?

2. How do I know if shes using me ?

3. Nearly everytime we have gone out I have done all the paying, she hasnt contributed as yet. i dont ming paying but sometimes I think fair is fair, eg sometimes she pays and sometime me.

4. what got me a bit mad oneday, last week after we had coffee i was walking with her and all of a sudden she decided to take out her ipod and put on her headphones
whil walking with me, sorry perhaps I am over reacting but I just did not like it, she had them on for 10 mins or so.

5. I have tried to kiss her but she wont let me kiss her on the lips 100%, yes have kissed her on lips but not full one just here and there, she said its still bit too early to kiss her on the lips. i said understand and fair enough, but like I said yes i have kissed her on lips but not full on.

6. Any tips or advice to find out if she truly loves me or is just using me, and whats the best thing to do to test her. I.e also play the game with her. like i said ive been
burn and used before dont want this to happen again.

please feel free to ask me any questions and I will do my best to answer them.

thanks for your help.

[Boisdevie]

After 5 or 6 dates you should be kissing full on the lips at the very least. And if she's not offering to pay that would annoy the shite out of me. In both cases could this be a cultural thing? Or is she just frigid and stingy with money?

[Albinoni]

Ok I would say I ve been out with her 5 times at most now.

I have tried to kiss her on the lips gently and half the time if not more she tries to sort of turn her head, but yes sometimes she will kiss me and sometimes wont, not sure if shes shy or not. But she doesnt reject me all the time just now and again.

re the paying I m not sure if its a cultural thing to be honest but I dont think so.

Like I said I want to suss her how and see if shes genuine or using me, perhaps I should pull back a bit eg no contact but i mean dont ignore her fully, play the game.

[Albinoni]

Ok I would say I ve been out with her 5 times at most now.

I have tried to kiss her on the lips gently and half the time if not more she tries to sort of turn her head, but yes sometimes she will kiss me and sometimes wont, not sure if shes shy or not. But she doesnt reject me all the time just now and again.

re the paying I m not sure if its a cultural thing to be honest but I dont think so.

Like I said I want to suss her how and see if shes genuine or using me, perhaps I should pull back a bit eg no contact but i mean dont ignore her fully, play the game.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Go for a real kiss next time you see her. If she doesn't go for it, then stop contacting her. If she asks you why you don't talk to her anymore, tell her that she doesn't seem interested in anything more than friendship. You should be going after other girls until you two are established as exclusive.

[Albinoni]

Go for a real kiss next time you see her. If she doesn't go for it, then stop contacting her. If she asks you why you don't talk to her anymore, tell her that she doesn't seem interested in anything more than friendship. You should be going after other girls until you two are established as exclusive.

When I tried to kiss her did she it was still to early in the stages to be kissing, I think she meant that we havent been dating long enough and not even a month as yet. Also I think shes a bit shy but nor sure if this is a major factor. but sounds like she wants to know me more. Like I said I am curious to find out if shes really keen on me or just using me

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Stop paying for her, and stop initiating contact, and see if she still wants to hang out with you.

[Albinoni]

Stop paying for her, and stop initiating contact, and see if she still wants to hang out with you.

Well we are going out tomorrow and i have already promised to take her out for a pizza, anyhow I am going to make this the last and after this I wont contact he anymore and just to test to see if she's really genuine. i am not saying I am going to completely ignore her but I will pull back andthe ball is now in her court. This will than be the test of time and to really see how genuine this girl is. If she is truly genuine than she will contact me and hopefully oneday take me out and pay for me, simple as that.