Head or heart? Advice please!

[xmissix]

My bf of a year has been meeting up with this girl he met recently, texts her all the time and there is obviously a connection between them.
I am so scared that they are going to fall for each other.
He says that there is nothing going on, but he keeps on hiding his phone and being really secretive.
As I am writing this, I am probably answering my own question about what to do...but I am driving myself mad over it, he knows about stuff that has happened to me in previous relationships (being cheated on etc.)
I don't know whether to walk away now while I still have some pride and completely let go...or do I hang on in there, just in case nothing does happen?

[xmissix]

Oh some additional information, she has apparently made it quite obvious that she likes him

[Boisdevie]

Tell him you're unhappy with the situation. If he refuses to stop seeing/texting her then you're out of the relationship.

[cheekxs]

I think we as woman need to be stronger when it comes to dating and deal with men in relationships.

Instead of keep the bullshit going cause of our emotions.
Cause the guys dont stop, they keep their crap always the same.

Its us that often suffer!

So stand your ground and tell him how you feel, and if he thinks that is more important.
He can keep doing it cause it is over!
And do it!

And with you or without you he will respect you at the end!

[smackie9]

Is it not obvious? Dump him, it's well over anyways.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Yeah, dump him. Your relationship is over. You're either going to get cheated on(again) or dumped for another girl. I suggest ending it by text, and ignoring his attempts to get you back.

[smackie9]

Tip: if one has to be secretive about something then they shouldn't be doing it.

[lizzy-bet]

Personally, I'd say show me your text messages or I'm out the door.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Personally, I'd say show me your text messages or I'm out the door.

If it's come to that, what's the point?

[lizzy-bet]

If it's come to that, what's the point?

If he wants to stay in the relationship he'll show her the texts. Obviously she really likes her boyfriend, so this will help determine whether she should stay or not.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You're missing the point lizzy.

What the hell good is it going to do to stay with a guy that obviously has feelings for another girl. Looking at text messages(which can be deleted btw) isn't going to change what is going on.

[Maple1714]

Yeah, get out. Don't make a big deal of it...just move on. Maybe he will realize how great you are once you are gone and come back, who knows? Let him figure out what he really wants on his own...don't stand around and wait. Not a hard situation...but it does suck to be on your end of things. Turn your situation around by going out and meeting someone new and better!

[lizzy-bet]

I'm not missing the point, he shows her the text messages or she leaves. It is possible that he will want to make things right if she puts her foot down. He hasn't really been reprimanded for his actions, and she should confront him about it since that hasn't happened yet.

[xmissix]

He says he still wants to be with me, wants to get "through it".

He won't stop seeing her, they could just be friends as far as I know, but I find it difficult to believe.

Maple (and others) I appreciate your advice and I tend to agree. If I am spending more time feeling miserable than happy, I do need to turn it around.

To be honest, it could give me some time to work on "me", as even if they are "just friends" me feeling jealous isn't healthy, and would ultimately drive us apart anyway...

So thanks for the advice. I am going to let it lie for a bit and not make rash decisions, have some time to think without contacting him.

[smackie9]

We already know he is having an emotional affair with this girl....with guys when they pursue an interest it's sexual. He has intentions, it's a no brainer this guy has wondered away from his relationship. so there is no point, the guy obviously doesn't like his GF anymore and is too much a coward to end it.