Dear L,

You have been poisoned by constant contact with abusive people. So much has it been incorporated in your life that you can't even recognize when your behavior has become like theirs. You feel justified, even righteous in imposing your will on others "for their own good", and won't even try to see that is wrong.

You keep trying to use coercion and threats on me to try and force me to give you approval for your actions, then you get baffled when it fails to work. Should you decide that you do want to speak about this reasonably, all you need to do is call.

Be aware however, that I've had enough of those behaviors in my life, and won't validate them for you. I love you so much, and am sorry about what's been going on for you. I know I shouldn't have yelled last time we talked, and I'm sorry for that.