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Thread: Is it okay to date your best friend that is also 2 years younger than you?

  1. #1
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    Is it okay to date your best friend that is also 2 years younger than you?

    I'm 18 and a Freshman in college and the guy I like is 16 and a Junior in high school. He's not just any guy though, he's my best friend.

    We've been best friends for over a year now. We tell each other absolutely everything. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me over a month ago, and my best friend (Let's call him Jake) was there for me through it all. He was a shoulder to cry on and he talked to me through the night. He was always there to make me laugh and smile even though I was heartbroken. Jake and I got extremely close after the whole break up thing. We started hugging a lot more and I started to think of him as more of a friend. At the time I thought it was just my brain wanting to rebound. Jake had just recently been rejected by a girl he liked a lot. We were talking about it, and I said that I just need a summer rebound. He said that he wanted the same thing. One day Jake came over to my house and one thing led to another and we started making out. After that we promised each other that we would just forget that it happened and stay friends. Then he came over again and it happened again. Jake suggested that we have a secret summer love thing to get ourselves over the girl he liked, and my ex. Then when summer was over and I went back to school we would stop it. I know it was stupid because of course we couldn't go back to being friends, but we both needed it at the time. Basically he became my secret summer boyfriend. We eventually told two of our close friends, and they promised not to tell anyone.

    Now that summer is coming to a close for me (I start school late because of college) Jake thinks that we could make this work as an actual couple. He wants to try an actual relationship because "we'll always question what could've been if we don't." I really have grown to like him a lot, but I don't know if I'm ready for a full relationship yet. I am over my ex boyfriend (I saw him recently and I didn't feel sad or angry), but I don't know if I want to start something with another person just yet. Jake says that he'll wait for me until I am ready, but I don't know how long that is going to be. Another thing is that Jake is 2 years younger than me and still in high school. I don't know if that'll work. The reason that also freaks me out a little is that he is the same age and in the same classes as my younger sister. Her boyfriend is also that age. I think I want to try a relationship, but I'm just not sure yet, and I don't know if it is the right thing to do. A lot of of our friends suspect that something is going on between us, and we've heard from the two close friends that we told that everyone wants us to get together. He does make me extremely happy. I trust him with my life and he's the best friend I could ever ask for, and he has been an amazing boyfriend to me over the summer.

    And now for the questions I have:
    Is it okay to date a guy who is 2 years younger than me and still in high school?
    Is it a good idea to date my best friend?
    Will people in college find it weird that I am dating a high school Junior?
    What happens if it doesn't work out? Are we going to be able to go back to being best friends?
    How do I know that I for sure am ready for a relationship?
    How do I know for sure that I like Jake as more than a friend?
    How do I know for sure that my brain isn't still in rebound mode?
    Should I just stop it now and move on to college and the new relationships I'll make there?

    I am so sorry that this is so long, but if anyone could help me I would really appreciate it. I guess I'm just confused about my feelings right now. I need someone to help me sort them out. Thank you!

  2. #2
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    Is it okay to date a guy who is 2 years younger than me and still in high school?

    The age is just a number, its not a actual problem at all.

    Is it a good idea to date my best friend?

    Well, you said it didnt go back to the friendship it was before you did someting with him. it probably will never do.
    You should have thought about it more if you just want him as your friend. But in general its a good thing that you are good friends before you get into i a relationship, a very good benefit that you get a long on a friendlevel also.

    Will people in college find it weird that I am dating a high school Junior?

    So what if they do ? the age is just a number it wont be a big difference when you are 29 and and hes 27

    What happens if it doesn't work out? Are we going to be able to go back to being best friends?

    No, its a chance you took - it wont never be the same again trust me

    How do I know that I for sure am ready for a relationship?

    You probably never do for sure. but you gotta lsiten to your feeling, not listen to what he says or what friends says about it. you are the only one who knows when you are ready to try it.

    How do I know for sure that my brain isn't still in rebound mode?

    Give it more time...think ..feel ...

    Should I just stop it now and move on to college and the new relationships I'll make there?

    Why stop it ?? whats the big problem here? cant see it ?

    sorry for my bad english, but those are my inputs about this
    </snip>

  3. #3
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    vashti is offline Hot love muffin guru
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    You'd better check with his parents about whether or not they'd mind you dating. Where I live, you can get thrown in jail for dating an underage kid.... are you prepared to have a criminal record? And yes, your college peers will think it's weird.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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