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Thread: less sex from one day to the other?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Posts
    4

    less sex from one day to the other?

    Hello!
    My Girlfriend and me are together now since about two years.
    The first three weeks we hat sex very often - that means 2-3 times per week. After that it went down to once a weekend except the "red days". This 3x per month isn't waht I would like to have but it is OK for me. At that time she was a pupil.
    After one year some things have changed.
    My parents were on vacation for three weeks so I thought we would have much time for us. (there was some trouble between my girlfriend an my parents). When she came to me the first thing she tould me was that she hast changed the pill because the old ones might have caused small cramp veins (dont know the right word - this small red-blue lines on the skin).
    So she toke no pill for one month what means no sex. Sex with condom isn't so fine so we reduced it to once a month or less.

    I was happy when the month was over but she told me that the security is not given in the first month with a new pill -> no sex. In the next month she has forgotten the pill on one day and decided to stop taking them. Instead she wanted to try the Nuva Ring and luckily she did not want to wait one month again. But she did not want any sex this time. After one month with the Ring she didn't get her period (I said no wonder because of what she did the last months) but she thought she was pregnant (but she wasn't - how should it have happened?)
    During this time she began her training (Job) and up to now I alwas hear the same:
    She is tired because of the hard training
    She ist worried about getting pregnant
    She hast stress
    ...

    In this last year we hat sex about every one or twoo months. When I remember we had real sex 3 months ago. 2 months ago we made it per hand an about 1 month ago she made it me with the hand.

    And that is another thing I do not understand. She seems not to be interested in Sex or even Kisses any more. When I want to kiss her, she wants only a kiss you would give your Children, too. But it's not only my Satisfaction - that ist something that i could manage myself. I want to make HER happy and I want to satisfy HER, not only me. But it seems as if that does not interest her anyway.
    By the time I also feel bad because I'm absolutely unable to get er excited any way. Cooking for her, giving massages, fondling, kissing (also Neck or ears etc), nothing helps.
    When I make small hints (if directly verbal/touching or indirectly) she said she feels to be set under pressure. But I du not want to to this so I stopped it (at least the last points).
    On the other hand she often says that we could "do it" at this oder that day, or what she would like to do what makes me hot - but it are words only. There happens nothing.
    Sometimes she says she is excited. this is when I am not at her or in really bad situations (when we are just ready to go somewhere and are just late e.g.). This excitation stays for 5 minutes and after that 5 minutes I must not try it, it ist in vain. And when I miss this 5 min, I can wait a week or tow, until the next 5min.
    This means there are about 5min a week I have the chance for sex and if I do not use this Chance its my fault. On the other side she tells me something that she does not have a Button which makes her want to have sex. (but I must!)

    Besides i think my Brain is in my head. I'm not such a rabbit than many other men although the text sounds like this. If I would just want to have fun i had leaved her a long time ago. I love her and will not leave her because of this problem. I make the best of having less sex but it gets more and more less and this hurts me. If she does not want to have sex she has no problem with having no sex but it hurts me.

    Uh it's a long text now. I don't know if I want an answer whether this is normal or whether I'm too horny oh wahtever. Perhaps I only had to tell this someone...


    P.S.: english isn't my native language so I hope you understand what I wrote?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    57
    You got your point across. In my opinion, you should talk to her about it, and if this has been going on for a while, then set things straight. Let her know that its hurting you, and that's not fair, you seem like a nice guy, and you're trying to be as understanding as possible. Sex is not just sex when you love the other person, its called "making love" for a reason, and you have every right to be hurt. If things don't change in the near future after you talk to her, then I know its going to be hard because you love her, but it might be time to move on. There must be something on her mind to act this way, and unless her reply sounds genuine, don't settle for lame excuses.

    Good luck with it.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    12
    If it happen because your girlfriend have low libido then I recommend to try pills that increase female libido. Personally I tried Sentia herbal supplement and it really worked for me. After this my relationships with boyfriend had improved a lot!

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