How long would you wait for sex?

[GirlOne]

Hi Everyone,

Here's my update on my online romance - no, not anything like General Petreaus ;-)

Summary: So, I have the hots for this guy I know online, but not via online dating as it was a sports website, but he got flirty with me and we soon were sexy messaging every day. That was 6 months ago. He lives in a far away city and doesn't have much money, neither do I. I also have exams. I am late 20's he's 30. I was reluctant to meet up as I needed to shift some weight, which I did and now I'm back to my slim self. He has said several times to come and visit him. He has a **** buddy who he sees but he would easily drop.

Originally when we started messaging, he said come and visit him immediately and I said I couldn't come for 6 months or a year then I just said I would visit in 6 months.

Now it is 6 months and truthfully, I don't plan to visit him for another 6 months after my exams are over.

Over the 6 months of messaging every day, my feelings have grown for him, so I love him now and he said he loved me once in one message and since I refer to myself as his girlfriend in messages and I tell him I love him months ago and he still messages me, I guess he is comfortable with my feelings for him.

Recently, he messages me every day but not the intensity it was in the beginning when it was messaging throughout the day and evening.

Does that mean he is going off me? or that we are comfortable in our feelings? or that since he knows it will be months away before I visit him, then there is no need to message every day?

Do I tell him that it won't be another 6 months before I come and visit him? Since he's already sleeping with this **** buddy (he's bored with her) I figure he's not putting his life on hold for me and he is free to meet new girls should he wish.

I think if I actually told him it won't be for another 6 months before I visit, he might give up ... although I have to say, messaging someone a short friendly message every day is not much effort, especially when he already knows there will be no limits guaranteed anything goes sex for him in 6 months time. Has the relationship run its course? Is he bored?

How do I keep him interested until I turn up in 6 months? Is it worth even a little break so we don't message every day and then resume messaging nearer the time?

Please advise me guys ... (Thanks)

[VincenzoG91]

The only time I ever waited that long (actually 7 months) was in the context of a serious relationship where we were going out almost every week. Usually, I go by the third date rule, which has probably saved me a lot of money and hassles.

You shouldn't be in love with this guy, you haven't even met him yet. He probably stays in touch with you just in case something might happen, but he is also probably trying to pick up on other women who are local. And for all you know, he might be trying to hook up with other women online as well. Just like you.

Tell him it will be another six months, and watch those messages become shorter and less frequent and then finally stop. Then start dating locally.

[haxan]

Ugh, aren't there any guys where you live?

[Boisdevie]

Perhaps she's scared of dating in real life. Or all the guys where she lives don't like em fat.

[Fruitsss]

its all cyber so i dont think its all serious. and he is way older then u.

anyway................u to young to hold on people u barely know