Why is she doing this to me?

[stylishmissy]

Hey everyone! This may be quite long (sorry).

Well basically, i came out of a relationship around a month ago now due to some of my own issues which i struggled handling. I won't go into that bit.
But anyway after the breakup we were both obviously relieved not be dealing stresses in the relationship, but it was a shame for it to end after 2 years because it was great underneath. So i went off and learnt to deal my personal issues better, and not let them rule me. Obviously i knew the relationship was over but i still kknew i needed to work on myself so that they dont affect another relationship. Anyway, after a few weeks of us not talking properly due to her anger and
frustration after the breakup, we then started talking civilly with one another. The issues were never anything big, only ones that were annoying but happening
constant! I didn't expect my ex to believe in instant that i'd learned to handle them better and that they are no longer there because it took me a few weeks, plus going on medication to help myself in dealing them. And i have, and have learned from the mistakes i made.

Now, to the worst bit, which hopefully someone can help me out on here, cause i'm incredibly confused!
After all the angst and nastiness had cooled down from the breakup as i said we started to talk and get on well as though we were starting a fresh of being just
friends, but generally getting on well after i'd dealt myself so much better. We've been speaking nearly everyday for the past week or so great, but this is where
more heartbreak comes along:/ She eventually approached me asking how i was etc, showing effort again. I knew it wasn't going to end back into a
relationship just like that, but it was a good start. She was mentioning us meeting and talking, and mentioned over having some other stresses at this time going on, which understandably would be the main focus. However days later, after being made to believe there was hope for us to get back together over time, and take things slowly, i started to feel i was being messed about. I tried being by her and supporting her and caring a lot for what she was obviously going through, but at the same time it's been painful enough to deal the breakup, then to have ad my hopes got up a bit by saying about us meeting and maybe to re trying with a relationship again etc and wanting me to be patient with her to sort out whatever issues she's struggling with right now. we'd both joined a dating site, but if its anything like the previous break ups we've had, then it's purely out of us both being messed up. But i don't even know whether she's genuinely after a a new partner, or does wanna come back to me hence saying over us re trying etc. I met a girl off the net as mates, and my ex became incredibly jealous and had admitted to loving me that night still (even though wont generally admit to any of her hearts feelings right now). I knew anyway that she must still love me to have told one our mates that she does, and that she is scared to com back incase the issues are there again. Which i understood! But back to where i was, we continued to get along great for days and she obviously hated the fact i'd met another girl when i wanted my ex back, which i suppose makes sense! But i wasn't meeting the girl for a relationship, only as friends.
Since the night my ex displayed the jealousy and hate of me speaking to this girl she had become incredibly nasty! Saying things like she was playing with my
head etc. Obviously this very much hurt. She then messaged a day later (yesterday) apologizing from the bottom of her heart and that she was basically in a mess from feeling depressed and her head being messed up and that. She practically admitted her barriers she has been holding up to come back incase we had those issues again in the relationship. I know it takes time for a person to believe issues are being controlled and are no longer there, but what i'd love to know is, does a person's head being messed up cause them to mess about acting all fine towards the person one min, then next min ignoring them?
We spoke again this morning and the conversation was mainly about her just stating that if i wanted her that much i wouldnt be meeting other girls. Maybe thats true, maybe it hurt her, i dunno. I mean this girl did admit after we met she fancied me, so.
The latest of the situation now is i have being ignored since the last message she put about saying if i wanted to retry with her that much i wouldnt be showing interet in other girls. I feel im being messed about. One min speaking all fine to me then ignoring me all evening when iknow she had been online.
I dunno whether to take it down to her feeling annoyed about me meeting someone else, or it down to her head being a mess! But it seems weird to me talking al fine this morn, then ignoing me!
Either way it's stressing me that much that i don't even know whether the apology she gace to me last night, that her heads messed up etc, was even true. And the stuff days ago about meeting and wanting to retry etc, whether this was all just playing me! although id never imagine her being that cruel!
I know this is a confusing situation, but it would ease me greatly just to have some opinion on it if possible. It may be that im wrong when i say its all being acted and made up, like the stuff yesterday, but i dont know. I dont believe this is her heart doing all this. She seems to be acting her happy self towards others and fine, then coming to me sayin she doesnt know whats happening with her. Could that just be a cover up to her friends ?Should i believe her head is messed up as she tells me?
I fail to see how after two years of loving someone, and knowing that both people would be hurting from the breakup etc, that one could sit there playing the other making out theyl meet up with them, try again, etc. When it's so much easier to just say no to ever being with that person again. All i do know is she has messed me about in the past when her heads been in a mess. When i asked earlier if we are going to try again and take this slow, i had no answer,
I'd love to believe that this is all her head playing games with her and that there genuinely is a fear there of her returning incase those issues come bac.
I just dunno where i am at all If a person is unsure whether they can re try with someone at that time, then why tell them maybe and that they'll meet them etc? It's honestly as though she comes close to re trying with me, then is pushed back by fear.
please no harsh comments
thanku!

[AnnonymousMan]

This can go 2 ways. She might not want a relationship with you yet holds feelings and jealousy of girls you talk to or she does want a relationship again but is mind ****ed. No one can change in a matter of weeks so the issues will still remain. If you continually let her keep tugging herself around like this she will eventually cave and ignore you entirely. You need to sit down with her and talk things out. Do not tell her you have changed. That is unreasonable expectations and a lie. Tell her you are still working on yourself and that you want to go back out with her but just limit the time you two see each other so you can work on yourself. If you make it like you're busy most of the time and give her indirect replies on the days you don't hang out about what you are up too, she will try for you harder. Just talk it out with her and be direct. Stop playing games with each other before one of you breaks.