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Thread: Friend or more...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
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    Female
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    South Africa
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    Friend or more...

    Right, literally can't believe it has come to this...but I need some advice!

    I have spent the last couple of years focussing on my career, so mean have not been a major focus and I have always felt aware of how me felt about me in relationships. However, there is this guy that has made a sneaky little entrance into my heart and I'm just not sure how he feels.

    The story:
    So I'd been living in London for 8 years...turned 30...had a mid life crisis and decided to make a change, so I quit my job. Prior to this, my mum and her friend tried to set me up with her friend's son [let's call him Richard]. Went to meet to meet Richard and his friends [turns not interested in Richard], but his friend 'Dave' was there. Dave is not my type, nice guy, but thought nothing of it. So when I quit my job i decided to get a hold of Dave [as he was a Business Director at an advertising firm, so wanted to see if he had any jobs] - turns out he had moved back to SA, which I myself was planning to do. Now bearing in mind I had met this guy ONCE, he gave me advice, set me up on interviews etc. and when I moved home, he constantly sent me texts to see how I was doing and if I was coping with the move...anytime I put a remotely negative facebook status update, he would call me and see how I'm doing. Just literally the kindest person I have ever met. He never talks about other girls, except to mention if someone found him attractive...but always says he's not interested. So my gut feel is would a successful 36 year old man really invest this amount of time in some girl, if he wasn't interested?! But then why hasn't he made a move? Should I make the first move...but if he doesn't feel the same way I'll lose a really amazing friend. I am fully aware of how girly and pathetic this may seem, but I don't fall easily and I don't want to mess this up! Help.....

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
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    1,036
    I think you're supposed to send a green light. Let him know you are interested, but let him make the first move if he wants to.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
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    Female
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    South Africa
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    Thank you for responding, uber grateful. Any tips on that 'green light' without being forward?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,622
    Two tips for you here.
    1. People who use the word 'uber' should be summarily executed. Similar to those people who use the word 'zeitgeist'.
    2. A green light can easily be found in any good DIY shop in the electrical section. Just ask one of the sales staff where the green lightbulbs are. Buy one, wwrap it up well to avoid breakages and send it to him in the post.

    Sorry. Was I being flippant? Yes of course but you're a grown woman and you simply don't have a clue. Do you want us to email him for you or something? Just ask him out on a date. It really is that simple.

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