My girlfriend is looking at other men

**James92** · 28-02-13, 05:00 AM

Hi All,

Ive been going out with my girlfriend for 8 months now, n recently she has been looking at other guys on facebook, a couple of weeks ago She joined a group called cuteboys and tumbler boys, I had a look on there the other day and noticed that they was pictures of topless boys who are fitter than me n have 6 packs and all.

And I was speaking to her on skype tonight and in front of me she was looking at what she says "cute guys" which makes me feel terrible like im not good enough for her anymore, it makes me feel like i need to lose weight n be like tha just for her, my bmi is perfect for my age tho.

What do i do?
Thanks guys

James92

**VincenzoG91** · 28-02-13, 05:08 AM

James, do you ever look at porn? Silly question, I know. How does she feel about that? This is probably comparable and perfectly harmless.

**James92** · 28-02-13, 05:10 AM

I used too but now im with her i dont cause i dont need to look at anyone else cause shes the most beautiful girl i know. I feel like i was her last resort n these are the guys she actually wants to be with

**HeartIsAching** · 28-02-13, 05:26 AM

Wow... rampant insecurities. Get a grip.

**Kromat83** · 28-02-13, 05:33 AM

Originally Posted by James92

And I was speaking to her on skype tonight and in front of me she was looking at what she says "cute guys" which makes me feel terrible like im not good enough for her anymore, it makes me feel like i need to lose weight n be like tha just for her, my bmi is perfect for my age tho.

What do i do?
Thanks guys

James92

Your looking to much into this, I have told my girl which girls are
attractive, it doesn't matter, since I am with her for a reason, and
I am not the best looking guy, but i treat her extremely well.

It's just a picture, if she likes looking at it, who cares.

What is someone that looks like a model going to
do for a person, if they have no personality?

I would turn down a gorgeous girl, if she acted dumb all the time, as
i can act silly, but there are times when to act serious and smart.

**smackie9** · 28-02-13, 05:52 AM

Reality check: everyone looks at others, fantasizes about others, dreams about others, masturbates thinking about others, doesn't mean they don't appreciate the one they are with. She is looking at pictures and enjoying the view. If she was interacting with them that would be different. As they say you can look at the menu as long as you don't place an order.

**HeartIsAching** · 28-02-13, 05:54 AM

My wife points 'em out to me.

I would point 'em out to her, but I'm so freaking clueless when it comes to other men. Can't tell what's good looking and what's not. I do ask her though... usually I get it wrong, LOL.

**VincenzoG91** · 28-02-13, 06:28 AM

Originally Posted by HeartIsAching

My wife point's 'em out to me.

I would point 'em out to her, but I'm so freaking clueless when it comes to other men. Can't tell what's good looking and what's not. I do ask her though... usually I get it wrong, LOL.

Yeah, I don't have a clue either. Apparently women think Channing Tatum is hot, but he looks ugly as hell to me.

**HeartIsAching** · 28-02-13, 06:45 AM

I had to look him up. The douchey faux-hawk doesn't help.

**rob1984** · 28-02-13, 07:01 AM

yup, insecure man.. but hey if you think she is into guys with 6 packs and such.. why not use this as motivation and better yourself for you and her. I bet you will both enjoy it.

**tassy** · 28-02-13, 07:10 AM

James I am sorry some people on here are very blunt, cold and direct with their advice and opinions. I personally think that if anyone is coming here they need the tender touch.

Have you tried talking to her and explaining how this makes you feel? This is what i would do as communication is the key, if she thinks it's no big deal that is fine, for her. However if after you have told her your feelings on the matter and this is not something she respects or understands or at the very least just considers how it makes you feel, and it is something that you can not accept or feel comfortable with then it falls to you...........what do you want? As she is doing what she wants regardless of how it makes you feel (if she continues after you explain how you feel about it) Do you want to be with someone who likes to look at things that make you uncomfortable? Even when she knows it makes you feel this way? She has every right to look at and do whatever she wishes and you have the right to accept this or not. She could stop doing this once she knows how it makes you feel which would be nice, or she could be smarter and hide it from you and just lie about it, who knows matey. But try talking to her is my advice. Good luck xx
(on a side note you have opened a can of worms with you admitting that you dont WANT to watch porn now that you have a girlfriend cos on here there are manay who have argued and argued that that just does not happen - think they know everything and everyone sometimes pfft)

**rob1984** · 28-02-13, 07:23 AM

Tender touch.. wtf!!! OP.. basically you need to get to the root of why its bugging you.. just because you do not like it.. does not say she cannot do it. Thats controlling someone. She should not have to limit how she lives cause her bf has problems with his insecurities. Her being attracted to someone else will happen.. a lot, everyday she is out, she will see someone she finds attractive. Do not control her because you have issue with jealousy.

and as for the tender touch.... There there james, all will be good... here's a tissue. Would you like some water or a back rub

Hows that Tassy???

**tassy** · 28-02-13, 07:54 AM

Rob you do know all about this dont you? "her being attrated to someone else" (people who live in glass houses mate) You also know all about control too dont you (making sure she was on her period whenever she spent time with him)

James you dont need a tissue, but some of what this tool has said I happen to agree with SOMEWHAT, you can not change anyone else, you can express what you feel about a situation then it is up to them as to what they do with that infomation, then it is up to you with what happens with you next, it sucks I know cos one would hope that our feelings being hurt would be enough for the one who claims to love us to stop the behaviour that hurts but sadly that is not always the case so yes she has every right to do what she wants to, you should not demand she stop, if she chooses to stop because it is not that important to her that she continues to do it even though it hurts you then thats great, but you shouldnt try to force the issue cos that will only cause other problems, lies, sneakiness. But she does continue even after you have expressed your feelings then you have to turn to yourself and ask yourself if this is something you can accept or not and if not then what do you do next? Same stuff as I said before sorry for repeating myself.

**rob1984** · 28-02-13, 08:12 AM

lol she spent time with him once, and i was okay with it.. she was on her period that week ,if something were to happen, i trust my wife not others if something were to go down I had some insurance to as far as it did. lol again you keep bringing this up and it has nothing to do with this thread or what I said. My wifes mental stability at this time is irrelevant. The OP has insecurities. You are trying to suppress his wife's attraction towards others and making hiim feel its okay to feel the way he does. You will lose this one again Tassy.. you may need back up

**tassy** · 28-02-13, 08:39 AM

blah blah blah is all i read when I see a post from you.

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