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Thread: How to trust my boyfriend again?

  1. #1
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    How to trust my boyfriend again?

    So recently me and my boyfriend have been having some troubles. I'm trying to figure him out and his the intentions. I know he loves me deep down and everyone else knows It but there are just some red flags that keep showing up. We take our relationship seriously so we don't go and hang out with people of the opposite sex other than each other. I get jealous easily and I don't know why. But other then that everything is perfect. We are so in love. But I get angry easily and he has quite a temper so once we start arguing, it's like fighting fire with fire. We have been together for just over a year and a half. So I just figure out that whenever he gets mad he takes his anger out on something. Just a few weeks ago we almost broke up ( we always do this I don't know why but its been countless times that we have almost broke up and got back together instantly). So a few weeks ago after we had a huge fight he goes and adds this slut that I don't like on Facebook. We agreed that she's a whore and before he told me he hates her and he will never talk to her again. Little did I know when we had this fight he went and added her on Facebook. I got furious when I found out and obviously he apologized. And deleted her. Little things like this come up. I feel like I can't trust him with his friends. They all talk about hooking up with girls and it influences him. I tried telling him and he agrees but he says this is his last year of high school so he just wants to live it up. Of course he has boundaries ( he says his intentions are never to hook up with any other girl he says he wants to marry me and be with only me for the rest of his life. Even his mom told me the things he told her about me made her almost cry. I know he loves me but sometimes his actions make me question this trust. Months ago, we had each others Facebook passwords always. Recently I have learned to be without it because he does need space too.. He's a guy. But he lies to me alot about little things that have to do with other girls and Facebook related things. Which is why I am obsessive and always demand for his password to build trust from scratch. Just about 3 weeks ago I saw him at a bus stop around 1030 pm and I was with my other friend and this bus goes to my area where I live and he doesn't live around these so I was curious as to why he was there on a Friday night going somewhere. He told me he was coming to my house to surprise me. So I was so happy I believe him and everything and he ended up dropping me off close to my house and never ended up going cause he said the whole point was to surprise me. Just yesterday I was at his house and I go through his phone and his Facebook account. And I run not this conversation which is a 3 way between his best guy friend and this girl in his school who's 3 years younger. And they are flirting with her!! I noticed something fishy and not right about her a few months ago and I had those instincts so I told him to delete her since she was so random. Just a week ago he accepts her friend request and I'm thinking what the hell I told you to not talk to her. So he reassures me that nothing's going on and there's nothing ther. Little did I know a few days before I was at his house yesterday, he was flirting with her telling her he hopes she won't get back with her ex , telling her that "me and you are gonna happen sweet cheeks" once I started reading it he got all embarrassed and had to prepare himself. He assured me that this was useless and that him and his friend were just ****ing around with her. Look like I don't know how guys are like but I find this very disrespectful. And I stormed out of his house after several attempts. He keeps telling me sorry that no other girl means shit to him but me. Do about that whole bus incident, once he let me have his Facebook password after last nights incident, I snooped more around his Facebook and guess what I found out. That night when I saw him on the bus he was going to a party after all. I knew it was too good to be true that he was coming to see me. I confronted him earlier today as to why he lied to me and he said because I would never let him go if he told me. And this was this girls party that I told him not to talk to but he told me he just went to blaze and to chill with guy friends. I don't know if this is okay. To go to a party alone without your gf on a Friday night. I am very hurt still I can't figure it out. All this "useless " worrying that I have is Getting to me. I don't know why he does al this, maybe our rules are too tight? I don't feel the need to go to parties... Why does he have to flirt with girls on Facebook even if he tells me it's nothing. Please guys tell me what's on his mind. I need advice. The only reason we have explosive fights is cause I find these little things he does. And it all ends up coming out into the open. So we had an argument about all this today and he said I'm annoying that why he goes and does these stupid things. He's telling me I need to trust him. I demanded for his Facebook password again, and he refuses to give it. He said he's tired of al this. Well I'm tired of hearing lies!! I don't know what to do!! I feel like I need to give him space,,, but at the same time there are boundaries you don't cross. ... And we don't see each other every day. Maybe once or twice or 3 times a week at the most.. So I'm not all up in his face. Please tell me how to build trust. I feel like I have to tell him that if he doesn't cooperate and give me his Facebook password then I'm not going to be in this anymore. Let me know what u guys think. Especially boys opinions matter!!

  2. #2
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    I dont think you should be together. You dont trust him at all, your controlling and smothering and your fights are ridiculous.

    He also seems to want to be single-and i think you have a few reasons not to trust him.

    The whole relationship is unhealthy and destructive.

    You cant control him or change him so if your not happy with his behaviour-you should just break up with him.

    Too much drama-i would have dumped him ages ago.

    I think the relationship is too serious, complicated and dramatic.

    You both have a lot of growing up to do

  3. #3
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    i agree with michelle

  4. #4
    shesjustnotin2u's Avatar
    shesjustnotin2u Guest
    With no trust, it is hard for a relationship to grow. Give your relationship space and re-evaluate its worth the sleepless nights.Sounds like hes also not ready for a serious relationship. Therefore, You cant force him to be in a relationship or itll be for the wrong reason and make matters complicated. Let him go. Give him his space to grow and realize what he wants.

  5. #5
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    So sad dear. I also can not help you because i have also lost trust of my Girl friend. Actually she blame me. There is no truth she know but she is not agree to listen me more. How i talk her????? I love her.
    john

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