How to tell a guy you have a crush on him without scaring him?

[Sirana]

There is this guy, the problem is that he moved away. But we are in touch, we went on couple of dates. He said he is into me. He knows I'm into him too, well I hope so sometimes men are too stupid to read between the lines!

Well I was honest with him and sent him some email telling him between the lines I am crazy about him, but messed it up with being a bit bitchy in the end claiming the way acts sometimes is not how friends act, then I said I'm sad by some of his actions and basiclly told him goodbye! But a guy answered me in a positive way, I guess in a positive way. Telling me he is extremly busy lately, we don't have time to talk and so on, but that he loves to have me around and that he wants to be in contact with me when he settles down a bit with his rushy carreer. Since I am all I figured it out like he is into me too, but maybe this was just a nice way to blow me off, I don't know. A guy basiclly just kept on apologizing. If it was a blow off he wouldnt tell me he misses me and wants to keep in touch with me, right?

I just want to get over it and tell him dierctly I have a crush on him and not to beat around the bush anymore and sending him my moody emails! I was thinking of writing him back short, just a few senteces telling him I have a crush on him and add some "funny" notes to it and tell him I just wanted him to know that and that it is ok, no need to overreact or something, no pressure. I'd also maybe apologize for my reactions I caused before and that him that I couldnt help it because I have a crush on him. Is this ok?

My male friend told me I should be direct and tell him I like you, do you like me? Whats going on with us? But I think thats to harsh and I don't want to make him any pressure

Any advices, maybe I am 30, but when it comes to men I'm 13 years old.

[basilandthyme]

You said that he moved away. It's quite possible that he won't want a long distance thing and would prefer to date women who he can see easily. Just something to think about before you go saying anything.

Also, as he already doesn't have enough time for you, I can't see that you'd be content with him even if he wanted to be your boyfriend.

You're thinking with your heart and not with your head.

[Sirana]

I am aware of these things very much, you are right! Yes, I know I am thinking with my heart, women are not rational sometimes, but its the way how I feel. I think I need to do it and say those words directly:"I have a crush on you!" For myself's sake.

I mean its complicated story as I said above I basiclly told him goodbye, but he kept apologizing to me and saying he wants to stay in touch with me. I don't know what to think, seriously. Maybe I'll sound crazy now, but maybe he is testing me and my reactions to see how I am like in these situations when "he doesn't have time". Maybe its just a blow off and he is being nice to me. I think I'll know the answer by saying those 6 words out loud in a casual way no strings attached.

[Sirana]

I am insecure, If he calls me an tells me I have a crush on you too, then I'll chill and calm down, I'd be content then

[basilandthyme]

As you are insecure, how will you react if he doesn't share your feelings? And frankly, given what you've written, I think there's a good chance of this outcome. I think it's pretty unlikely that he's testing you - guys usually mean what they say.

[ashley89]

1) he moved away, and it isn't a temporary thing because he's going to be having a career where he moved. it's not like he's coming back any time soon, and long distance relationships rarely work out. 2) he hardly has time for you now, if you dated how would this change? I just don't see the point in telling him if there is really no chance this is going to turn into anything serious.

[michelle23]

Hes "busy" i would take that as a blow off.

[Sirana]

The thing is I don't want anything more, I just want to tell my feelings out loud because of myself! I'll just use it as an exuse for how I acted. I'll tell it in a "funny way" stressless way, making clear I have no expectations, thats all

[Sirana]

I've meant testing me by his being busy! Its not that I am making some exuses for this guy or that I am naive, but I blew him off and then he said he likes me and that he wants to talk to me and be part od his life. It just doesn't make any sense to me. If someone told me what I told to him, I wouldn't response in a way he did to me. I'd just say sorry I am busy and thats it. Or I'd be honest and get it all done in a nice way! I wouldn't mention: hey I want you in my life when it settles down.

You know, don't worry about me. I have nothing to loose more then I already did, so I think its a good thing that I get it off my chest with out complicating things anymore and beating around the bush