Getting over a first love

[andy5]

Hello all, I was wondering if I could call on all of your expert advice to help me out in my situation. Basically, I need to get over an ex, my first girlfriend, who was very very bad for me. Suffice it to say we were together a very long time and she was, let's say, bipolar in a very bad way. Half the time she was sweet and half the time she was awful, very self centered. So finally I have moved on but now am having trouble with my current situation since a-so much reminds me of the ex and so much of my identity was formed with her, b-she was a great talking companion, as I said, about half the time, and c-she is a shut in who never dated anyone before me and is likely never to again, therefore provoking my sympathy despite myself. So, any suggestions on what to do? I have tried desperately to just try to reset myself to where I was before I met her to remind myself of how life used to be, but it doesn't seem to want to go back. So then how do I move forward but be able to make peace and be happy the way I used to be after all this heartbreak and with someone new?

[Rowen]

You need to be strong and just be with friends and family for now. Don't focus on her. Focus on you. Think of the hobbies you had before you met her. Try those again. You never know what will happen.

And when you start to feel like you can handle it again, put yourself out there to talk to other girls. Seeing the ones out there who can treat you right will definitely make you wake up and realize that it doesn't have to be the way it was with your ex.

[pcmaster]

Stay a mile from everything than reminds you about her. With her presence in your mind you will never heal.

To feel better do a good things to yourself - take care of yourself. Socialize with friends and relatives, follow your passions or meet new friends who have interesting hobbies and get into new exiting things.

Always think positive and dont miss a thing.

[kat82]

Keep yourself busy, think positive, and surround yourself with the people you love (i.e. friends & family). Eventually you will find that this may have been a great learning experience. I broke up with my first love 10 years ago and learned so much about myself. I used the things I learned to find the perfect man for me. Once you heal you will move on.

Make yourself smile every day, too