One last time or let him go? :(

[Ymme]

Where to start?

I met this guy on a dating site.
We started chatting for days on end, days turned into weeks and then months.

He lives four hours away and him and i started a LDR, but recently he ended it, saying he just can't have a phone relationship anymore and that he just wants and needs me to be there and not somewhere he can't physically reach me.

The long distance has put quite a strain on us both mentally and physically but I guess some people just can only try for so long.

This man suffers from bipolar also so I know that he over thinks things and the idea of me not being there was hard for him, but when we were together in person everything was amazing in every way.

Anyway, this is the root to why it's ended. Now the thing is, he knows I am moving closer within an hour from him (not because of him) but because it is something I need to do for myself.
I know this man really cares for me, and would do anything for me. He says he loves me but said he can't wait any longer. He talks to his friends often and sometimes they have given him the worse advice which causes him to think rationally and then we hit a speed bump about this everytime. He even said that they were starting to doubt that he had a gf. I know these thinkgs could and have help trigger his uncertain feelings

I understand that people get to a point and he has tried to give me extended time and ignore his needs for the sake of us, what I just don't understand is why he couldn't give me a little more.
He stated he wasn't getting any younger, he said he just can't do one more month of seeing me twice in person then the rest via phone.
We spoke on the phone for about 3 hours and I knew he was fighting his decision through conversation and everytime it went back to the sweet chatter something would trigger and he would correct himself and end up back on track.

It hurts but I respect and understand where he is coming from but what I want to know is, when I finally hit that location should I try again? Should I drop maybe a letter on his letter box, make some form of contact and give him the choice or should I just try and let go?



This all happened last night so things are fresh and unpredictable I just don't know what to do?..

[Cerby]

Quick question, have you ever met him in person? Just trying to gauge the reality of the relationship.

[amy37]

he doesn't sound really stable in his decisions.

Even with the fact that he's bipolar, if your gonna be in a relationship with him he's going to have to be solid about his decisions, that's something you should consider.
Not once did you mention your feelings towards him. I would consider finding someone else while theres little attachment.

[Ymme]

We have met in person, shared weekends with one another, he told me how he felt but it's about having a phone relationship for him that he has trouble with.

The whole living this far away was an issue from the start, he said he can't handle that I'm not there with him, I can't be supportive because I am where I am, he cant hold my hand, he cant physically touch me, etc. That's what all the problems came down to. Now the thing is we will be living in the same city, not really that far apart but he just couldn't wait for that little bit longer.

This isn't his first out burst and I know he tried to fight his decision but what to do?

[Ymme]

I did tell him how I felt, and he knew how my feelings were towards him but I guess maybe it wasn't enough.

[Kromat83]

i got over my long distance relationship on Thursday
(with who i met in Canada, but went to Poland) in a few hours
and found a better girl on a dating site from Canada, but
she's staying in this country for sure and meeting her soon.

[Ymme]

Thank you everyone for the advice. It's so good to see the pros and cons presented this way, sometimes it takes the advice from others to see what needs to be done, and positive reinforcements have allowed me to see clearly and I appreciate it all.

I won't be perusing him! If he really truly felt how he said, he definitely shouldn't have to second guess himself.

Funny thing is, he contacted me tonight and i was able to say no! so i shall continue to stand tall, stand proud and move forward!

Thank you all again for your comments!! x