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Thread: Secret love

  1. #1
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    Secret love

    hello. I am 23 yrs old girl,attractive. There is a handsome guy in my masters class. When I joined this course about 7 months ago I found him attractive. And fortunately a number of times(like 3 or 4) times I found him staring at me. Now that increased my interest. Around 2 months ago, he and his friend were standing in a queue for getting food. As i went there he moved and also moved his friend to make a place for me in the queue. I could not thank him because I am very shy and had an exam that day. Now for the past 2,3 weeks I am noticing even if he sees me he does not wait there long to see me and casually goes. Today we were giving exam in the same room. he was sitting 1 seat after me. after finishing the xam, I looked at him once but he was looking somewhere else(as if deliberately trying to look away from me).I have never talked to him. Yesterday he added me in a facebook group along with other friends. I thanked him mentioning his name. He didnot put a like on my comment. What should I do now? Because I badly want him but am too shy. should I slow down or try to talk to him. As I am very shy I dont know what to talk about or start a conversation. has he totally lost interest in me? But he is a serious guy and not a flirt.

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    If hes deliberately avoiding eye contact he feels shy and awkward too. That could be a sign he likes you. Have you any friend who could very subtly ask one of his friends what he thinks of you or they could even try to set you up on a "blind date" with him if your both shy. Get friends to help but tell them not to make it completely obvious or youll feel like a twat

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    Just tell him for heaven sakes. Say I have been noticing you for awhile and never had the nerve to say hi. I would like to get to know you better so how about we meet for coffee.

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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    Just tell him for heaven sakes. Say I have been noticing you for awhile and never had the nerve to say hi. I would like to get to know you better so how about we meet for coffee.
    But I have heard boys dont like girl who run after them. Should I also start to avoid him??

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    Asking a guy for coffee is obsessively chasing him? wow what is up with this generation.

    Look, if this guy is too shy, then he would welcome the idea of you at least introducing yourself to him, and have some kind of conversation and then giving him your number. Then he can do the manly thing and ask you out. You both already have been avoiding each other so far and nothing has happened, so what makes you think that avoiding him is going to make this any better?
    Last edited by smackie9; 30-03-13 at 12:08 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ria View Post
    But I have heard boys dont like girl who run after them. Should I also start to avoid him??
    If you never end up talking because you won't approach him then you lose anyway? You really don't have anything to lose by talking to him.

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    Definitely approach him. I'm a shy guy, and I've behaved the exact same way towards girls I was interested in. You don't even have to be up front about it. Just ask him to help you with something from class, or something stupid like that. Find some logical reason for getting together.

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    As longer you wait as harder is to break the silence. Next time you see him Hi straight away.(If you wait longer than 3 seconds negative thoughts start to creep in.) Ofcourse you want to say much more than that but its not that easy. So start with simple thigs like Hello, and next day you will be able to say "How are you?" and so on with every day become numb to fear by exercising your social skills.

    This girl could encourage you

    youtube.com/watch?v=dSwQDTEK8w8

    Death is nothing it's frightening not to live.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Prime39 View Post
    Definitely approach him. I'm a shy guy, and I've behaved the exact same way towards girls I was interested in. You don't even have to be up front about it. Just ask him to help you with something from class, or something stupid like that. Find some logical reason for getting together.
    Hey Prime, how would you feel if a good looking girl started to chat you up and then asked you out? Would that totally turn you off?

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    Quote Originally Posted by pcmaster View Post
    As longer you wait as harder is to break the silence. Next time you see him Hi straight away.(If you wait longer than 3 seconds negative thoughts start to creep in.) Ofcourse you want to say much more than that but its not that easy. So start with simple thigs like Hello, and next day you will be able to say "How are you?" and so on with every day become numb to fear by exercising your social skills.

    This girl could encourage you

    youtube.com/watch?v=dSwQDTEK8w8

    Death is nothing it's frightening not to live.

    LOL funny!......

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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    If hes deliberately avoiding eye contact he feels shy and awkward too. That could be a sign he likes you. Have you any friend who could very subtly ask one of his friends what he thinks of you or they could even try to set you up on a "blind date" with him if your both shy. Get friends to help but tell them not to make it completely obvious or youll feel like a twat
    That's actually a very good idea, especially if your friends verify in advance if both of you like each other. If you read some of the things people on here do to get a date with the object of their affection you'll realize this would be a really easy and pain free way to get together.

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    I personally love it when that happens! It wouldn't turn me off. It's happened to me before, on rare occasions. But every time it happened it turned out well. As long as the girl isn't too forward or clingy. Let me know your interested and then let me chase you a little bit.

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    This is the sort of thing girls need to know. There is nothing wrong with some small talk and handing over a phone number.

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    Not all boys/men are intimidated when girls do the talking first. I always found it flattering.

    You can't win if you don't play.

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    You know every time he looks at me, I feel so shy that I turn my face and look at some other direction. Should I also continue to look at him at that point?? I mean how would a guy like it??

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