Too Shy, need help.

[VenturaVentura]

Hey everyone.
I've got this problem: I am shy, I can not overcome it.
I am good looking, most of the girls at college like me and stare at me all the time, even 10 type of girls.
But I am too afraid to go up to them, I am always afraid that I am going to get rejected and they think that I am either in a committed relationship or I don't know. I've talk to other girls from other place they all think that I have a lot of girlfriends and **** buddies, everyone thinks that I am very successful in this type of things because of my looks. BUT **** IM NOT, I'm a total loser, I tried it 4 times and they played hard to get, they were telling me how they love to **** in general and when I asked her number she started coming up with some bullshit. I even gave up on one girl and she was confused, she told me that she would give me her number if I tried harder. But I don't know how to, and always afraid to try again and chase some hard-to-get girls, because if they will reject me I would be ashamed of myself and I'm depressed because of this shit all the time.


Could you guys give me an advice? Don't be a pussy does not count, I'm not less than a man in any other things in life...but in this case I'm like little boy, I admit it.

[meloveulongtime]

Maybe youre chase the wrong girls. They can assume all they want but in reality, it's their loss for not making effort and taking the time to get to know how great of a guy you are. Be patience and let things flow naturally for the right chick to come along.

[bcgirl]

Why not try the whole online dating scene. If u are good looking and have a picture up, you'll have no problem picking up girls on there. At least you will e away from the whole school scene and won't feel as humiliated if you get rejected and have to see the girl in class everyday

[pcmaster]

You have to be rejected first in order to overcome fear. Find a girl you dont care about and make her quit on you. Example - stare like a idiot at her and dont say anything until she leaves. You will find out it will be 10 times easier to talk to the girl you like afterwards.

[michelle23]

Do you want a **** buddy or would you prefer a REAL girlfriend? I always think better looking men are more loyal, honest and faithful to be honest. Its the ugly insecure ones that cant be trusted most of the time.. unless your a narcissist..

anyway.. forget these girls that play hard to get. they are attention whores. If a girl likes you-she will say yes and she wont mess you around or string you along.

Have you thought about what you want in a girl? what qualities/personality traits are important to you?

[pcmaster]

Yeah sometimes you think that beautiful girls are dangerous. But its the average girls who dont think they are beautiful is the most dangerous ones. Cause you are not carefull with them until its too late and your heart is already stolen.

P.S and getting a girls number is nothing she might give it out of pitty or to get off you.

[VenturaVentura]

Thanks guys for your advices. I'm still gonna try, though it hurts my self esteem.
Do you guys think that all hot girls are playing hard-to-get? Because they are approached by too many guys too often?
But even those hot girls like me, they stare at me so long that its sometimes uncomfortable, they smile if I approach and all that obvious signals. But the hotter the girl the more afraid I am to talk to them lol, if a girl is an average looking I have no problem, but to get the confidence I either have to be high or drunk.
So what you guys think? Should I just try to hook up with girls I don't even like (coz I have confidence only with them) just for the sake of experience?

[pcmaster]

Yes, start with girls that is up to your confidence level. The love will be mild and there wont be hights or lows. Just a steady nice feeling like strong friendship. Later on you will understand how girls mind works and that they are insecure as we are and basicaly not better than guys.

[kat82]

It sounds like you are going after the wrong girls. You're not trying hard enough...I have never said that to a guy. That's B.S.

[michelle23]

Thanks guys for your advices. I'm still gonna try, though it hurts my self esteem.
Do you guys think that all hot girls are playing hard-to-get? Because they are approached by too many guys too often?
But even those hot girls like me, they stare at me so long that its sometimes uncomfortable, they smile if I approach and all that obvious signals. But the hotter the girl the more afraid I am to talk to them lol, if a girl is an average looking I have no problem, but to get the confidence I either have to be high or drunk.
So what you guys think? Should I just try to hook up with girls I don't even like (coz I have confidence only with them) just for the sake of experience?

You can trust the hot girls more that the average or below average looking ones. Insecurity is like a disease. Have you ever watched Jeremy Kyle? Its nearly always the ugly ones cheating..

I dont think girls play hard to get tbh. Plenty of lads have thought Im playing hard to get when I just wasnt interested in them. If she says no she probably means it. Why would she turn you down is she likes you. It makes no sense.

I think the whole playing hard to get thing was made up so men dont feel too rejected.

If you want a girl to say yes-you need to be confident. Nobody likes a bloke whos sweating buckets or about to wet his pants. So what if she says no? Who cares? Just ask out the next one...

And no dont allow your insecurity to make you settle for second best. Try to boost your self-esteem and then find a girl you really like..

[pcmaster]

Actually you will find out that they all are bitches. But you have to find out for yourself. For now think girls are special etc. Treat them like a queens and its gona be wonderfull(if you dont become peasant).

[Starnique]

You need to grow some balls and approach them. Most females like a confident guy. If your too shy to approach me personally then I honestly dont want to be bothered with that guy. Find a few chicks you dont care about and practice. If your as hot as you claim to be then you shouldnt have a problem.

[Starnique]

BTW, no one in the world is everybodys type. U might get rejected some times but toughen your balls and move on. Im telling you women like the confident, know how to get what he want guy. You hve to grasp their attention when talking to them. Get all in their head and unless you know there may not be a chance you will see them again, then sometimes dont even get their number at first or dont call them right a way. Be bold, but not rude, ya know?

[bearz]

What are you after? A serious relationship or just fun? Are you looking to just pick up a girl off the street because that's different from asking out someone you already know a bit from work, school, sports, etc.

You can't fear rejection, you have to be confident. Worst that can happen is she says no, in which case you're better off already than you were before. At least now you know she's not interested and you can move on without having to wonder "what if".

[overanxious]

i used to be like this when i was younger...same exact situation.....sometimes girls were so aggressive themselves like walkking straight up to me and saying "youre coming home with me"....id hook up with girls and stuff...but i never wanted a relationship because i enjoyed freedom and didnt want someone elses happiness depending on me....i was afraid i wasnt going to be good enough....

I had a couple of girls begging me to take them out and give us a shot as a couple....and at the time i started to feel like i was maybe ready for a relationship...so i asked out a girl who was a family friend who had a crush on me for years since we were kids....and spurned the others......it started out as a whirlwind....i took her out to the type of restaurants shed never really been to....gave her shopping money...took her to sporting events and concerts with great seats....stuffed a card with alot of cash in it for her to go shopping on xmas along with other gifts......even then i would get complaints that i dont send flowers and post on fb enough about her......and when i couldnt get the things i needed/wanted out of the relationship i stopped doing really nice things for her.....i gave her some cheap birthday presents the last birthday of hers we were together and she was not happy....you could see how much it was annoying her that i wasnt doing great things for her anymore....would have been easy...give me what i need/want and ill continue to show you how much i appreciate you