My boyfriend and I make love and it's absolutely wonderful. He doesn't cuddle as much as I would like him to afterwards. I notice this with a lot of men (not that I have been with a lot because I haven't. I'm not promiscuious) I have heard other females say this as well. Why just roll over and go to sleep after without holding the female? My boyfriend used to do it all the time and I know he loves me but now he has gotten quite complacent. Does it depend on how much the man likes the woman in other instances?
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17-05-13, 01:19 AM #1
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Why don't most men like to cuddle after intimacy?
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17-05-13, 01:30 AM #2
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Have you tried telling your boyfriend that you'd like for him to cuddle you for a while after you have sex? I'm sure he won't be unwilling to, if you explain to him that for you, cuddling afterwards is as important as any other part of sex.
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17-05-13, 01:39 AM #3
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Somewhat I have. I'm not too vocal about sex for some reason. There's things I want to try but I'm too shy to let him know. He is way more experienced then me!
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17-05-13, 01:57 AM #4
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communication is the most important thing.
orgasm sends a rush of dopamine to the brain and it makes him sleepy. dont take it personally. as long as hes affectionate towards you in general it doesnt mean anything.
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17-05-13, 01:58 AM #5
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You need to communicate. Tell him what you need and want, he'll be happy to do what he can.
Originally Posted by NiaPeach
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17-05-13, 02:03 AM #6
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Yes it is. Normally I will just kind of place his arms around me and he will hold me for a few seconds and then roll over and go to sleep. I will try it I suppose.
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17-05-13, 02:30 AM #7
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is he affectionate outside the bedroom? do you feel close to him in every way? why dont you cuddle him when he turns his back to you sometimes. my bf loves it if i do that and he cuddles me too.
if you wana try new things in bed-just tell him that. if your close enough to be having sex with him then yoiu should feel comfortable talking about these things.
how old are you and how long have you been together?
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17-05-13, 02:41 AM #8
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I'd try asking him about it.
Honestly, all men are different, so some like to cuddle and some don't. For instance, I had sex with one who was like a cuddle bunny (He seriously laid on my arm and went to sleep till it went numb in 80 degree weather while I'm trying to cool a little.), and another time I had sex with one who insisted on moving to the other side of the bed afterwards. Not to mention, the physical exertion, as well as some of the chemicals released during sex, lead to a feeling of drowsiness for guys. That's actually why they tend to fall asleep faster than women (I read that, at least.). All in all, he might be ready to go to sleep or may not be big on cuddling in general, but that's not necessarily a reflection on your skills and/or personality. If it bothers you that much, though, I suggest you just try to bring it up to him in a light way.
I hope this helps.
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17-05-13, 02:53 AM #9
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No, it doesn't reflect level of liking or not: guys are pretty much conditioned to think cuddling is sorta gay and for weak, timid guys. The traditional alpha male ego thinks "banging" a chick and not cuddling after is a display of alpha status.
"1,2,3,4.....The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance power-drive!"
"Glory days/Well, they'll pass you by/Glory days"
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17-05-13, 03:11 AM #10
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Thanks people!
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17-05-13, 03:28 AM #11
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So you expect him to be a mind reader. Typical. Originally Posted by NiaPeach
Tell him what you want. Subtle hints don't work with men. Blatant hints don't work. Passive aggressive stuff doesn't work. Just say what you want.
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17-05-13, 03:33 AM #12
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Yes. I understand this and I will definately apply it.
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17-05-13, 04:38 AM #13
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Totally wrong there. The reason why men fall asleep after sex is to avoid having to talk to the woman they've just boned. Originally Posted by michelle23
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17-05-13, 07:23 AM #14
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I like cuddling after sex. After cuddling for a bit we have more sex. Then, my GF and I take a shower, go back to bed and cuddle some more, and she usually falls alseep pretty quick after that.
However, I can totally understand the not cuddling if it is hot in the house. But, the AC is usually pretty cold so not an issue for me.Last edited by FlaCooln; 17-05-13 at 07:27 AM.
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17-05-13, 10:45 AM #15
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Hey, if SHE doesn't roll over and start sawing logs afterwards, you ain't done yet, boyo.
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