Girlfriend sent a picture to her ex

**Simpo** · 17-05-13, 05:15 PM

I recently found out that my girlfriend sent a picture to her ex of just herself (no nude's or anything like that) over facebook but in private but she didn't set it to private quick enough so my friend seen it. The ex commented on it saying your gorgeous (note: he is in a relationship) then it was private so it could no longer be seen. Thing is she supposedly hates her ex since he told her he was cheating on her for a month in a 9 month relationship on the day they were meant to go to disneyland. I have been with her for close to 6 months now and she broke up with him about a year ago. I'm confused to say the least, she has said to me many times that she hates his guts and hope he gets his gf pregnant and ruins his life etc.

I feel I should confront her about this but not sure the best way to go about it. It's not like I was snooping on her or reading her messages etc, I heard it from a friend. Should I sit her down and ask her to answer some questions 100% truthful? At least then I will know if she is lying to me or trying to keep it from me.

**searock** · 17-05-13, 06:13 PM

Yes, you should do that. And you're right, you weren't snooping, so don't let her accuse you of that. Ask her what's up.

**Simpo** · 17-05-13, 06:20 PM

Originally Posted by searock

Yes, you should do that. And you're right, you wasn't snooping, so don't let her accuse you of that. Ask her what's up.

Im just really confused about this due to the circumstances. She says she hates him yet is sending him pics? I just want her to be honest with me.
Thanks for the advice though, I will ask her tonight what the deal is and how she is really feeling.

**searock** · 17-05-13, 06:23 PM

Originally Posted by Simpo

Im just really confused about this due to the circumstances. She says she hates him yet is sending him pics? I just want her to be honest with me.
Thanks for the advice though, I will ask her tonight what the deal is and how she is really feeling.

Yep, honesty is fundamental in any relationship, and it does seem like she hasn't been honest with you, for some reason. It's time to find out what that reason is. Keep us updated :-).

**Starnique** · 17-05-13, 07:36 PM

Of course you should confront her. Apparently she dont hate him that much if she sending him pics. Then again she could just be trying to show him how good she look to make.him feel some sort of way. I know I have done that before. Even still, don't be a sucker. Confront her.

**michelle23** · 17-05-13, 07:49 PM

Maybe she sent a pic where she looked really hot and said "look what your missing" or "its your loss".

Being cheated on makes a person slightly crazy. I know what its like to hold onto that anger and to want him to suffer so maybe that is all it was. It takes time to get over something like that and the anger does stay inside you for a couple of years (if not longer)

Shes probably still hurt and angry over what he did but it doesnt mean that she has feelings for him or that she wants him back. Love can very easily turn to hate when something like that happens.

Anyway you should just ask her calmly and see what she says. If she gets defensive or angry-it means she is hiding something or lying so be aware of that

**Wakeup** · 18-05-13, 12:52 AM

Originally Posted by Simpo

Im just really confused about this due to the circumstances. She says she hates him yet is sending him pics? I just want her to be honest with me.
Thanks for the advice though, I will ask her tonight what the deal is and how she is really feeling.

I think it has a lot to do with her ego. He likely bruised it pretty bad when he cheated on her and if she's now feeling like her old sellf and that she really is hot stuff and with her confidence back, and he asked her for an updated pic, then that would stroke her ego knowing that he was still interested in her (in some capacity). It necessarily doesn't mean that she want to be with him in otherwords.

Still, I agree with Sea in that you should be talking your fears out with her and get where her head (heart?) is at in why she would still be in contact with someone she claims to "hate."

Good luck, let us know what she says.

**Zaz01** · 18-05-13, 10:56 AM

If she hates him, she may still have feelings for him. Right?
To hate, you got to care.

**Rowen** · 18-05-13, 11:28 AM

Guys, I agree with your general idea that the OP should confront her, but I'll be honest and say this is the first time in my entire life I've ever heard of the possibility someone's sending photos to show what their ex can't have... I guess I don't get it because I've never done it? It just seems a little odd to me.

**TablesandChairs** · 19-05-13, 12:03 AM

I've never sent an ex I 'hated' a photo of myself; I don't even send the ones I don't hate and am still on good terms with photos. It's a bit strange. Pity you're not privy to the context in which it was sent.

It doesn't necessarily mean the worst but you may as well know what it was about.

**Wakeup** · 19-05-13, 12:41 AM

I never did either but then again there was no such thing as social networking and facecrap personal pages. When we were kids.. We'd do the accidently bumping into him on purpose routine though childish fluff, really, just to show him how "fly" we looked and that we weren't rolled up in our bed with puffed out eyes from crying just because he's not in our life anymore.I never did either but then again there was no such thing as social networking and facecrap personal pages. When we were kids.. We'd do the accidently bumping into him on purpose routine though childish fluff, really, just to show him how "fly" we looked and that we weren't rolled up in our bed with puffed out eyes from crying just because he's not in our life anymore.

**Am I crazy?** · 19-05-13, 02:37 AM

Sorry, I just cant seem to see where your woman did anything wrong. Why do so many people act like "EX's" should be shunned and dealt with as if they never existed. Just because you are no longer together as a couple does not mean you cant be friends. And, just because you are friends does not mean its only to have a sexual relationship. It always amazes how self centered and simple minded people are when it comes to a lovers ex. Very insecure.

**Wakeup** · 19-05-13, 03:19 AM

Very insecure... in Your opinion. Not everyone thinks it's insecure but rather more of a respect for your new partner and if this so called "friendship" is being done behind your new partners' back then it's definately got nothing to do with insecurity but rather disrespect. .. That's My opinion.

lalalita · 19-05-13, 05:48 AM

Ask her! Since it was made public (accidently), you weren't snooping. You can casually, in a none accusing way, bring it up. Her reaction will tell you everything.

**Simpo** · 20-05-13, 07:30 PM

Okay, after a lot of confusion it became clear that this was one big misunderstanding. Apparently one of my our friends liked a picture of her that she had sent to her boyfriend at the time which was last year so the picture re appeared in the facebook timeline and so the comments and everything were from a year ago and she still hates his guts. Phew!

But this lead to a new development, we ended up having make up sex and something new happened for her. I have started a new thread for it in-case you aren't into answering sex questions.

http://www.loveforum.net/threads/80841-Girlfriend-may-of-just-had-her-first-orgasm-with-me

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