Need advice with girl I met for potential marriage

[james_cameron]

Hi,

I first spoke to the girl 5-6 months ago we were introduced via a mutual friend/relative. We are both of the same religion and culture and we met with the sole intention of meeting for potential marriage down the line.

Since day 1 she has been really inconsistent with her texts, the first time I sent her a message it took her 2 days to reply, then nothing for nearly 2 weeks. Then randomly she replied and we texted most of the day then towards the end of the day she asked to meet with me.

She asked to meet me but took her around 1 week to confirm which days she was free etc. Then the day before we were meant to meet she changed the day saying if we could meet the day after instead. On the day we met she turned up nearly 1 hour late.

But, once we met I literally forgot all about her slow responses etc and had an amazing time with her spent around 8 hours together just talking etc.

On the way home she text me saying thanks for the chocolates etc. Sent a message back and got one back within 30 mins. So basically I thought the slow responses was over and done with. The next day sent her another message then got a response 3 days later. Was not sure if she was playing games etc so I asked her if she wanted to meet again and she told me she was busy with work etc. At this point was not sure what was going on so I stopped chasing her i.e. keep sending her messages. After a week she sent me a message after this got a reply mostly within 1 day from this point.

After 8 weeks she dropped a hint she was free so I asked her again and we met up again. Again went amazing spent again around 8 hours together. Also I said will it be ok to give you a call sometime and she said she prefers texts.

Around 2 weeks ago I asked her how she felt our relationship was progressing and she said she "wants to get to know me better". I basically told her I really like you and not talking to anyone else. Had no response to this. Thought best to wait around a week, sent her a message and got a reply within 3 hours.

Since that message things have gone back to her taking 3-5 days to reply to messages etc.

I really do like her and can see her as my "partner".

Not sure now what to do? Is she just slow? Not sure if she is playing hard to get?

[Wakeup]

Ask your friends if they have any other prospective wives that they could introduce you to. Failing that, tell this one how rude she is and if she's too busy to reply within a reasonable time period then you'd rather be single. Pfffft.

Seriously.. why don't you ask her why she's so rude? Does she know she's suppose to be a potential marriage partner to you? Does she have several men to choose from because she treats you very poorly? I'd not text her again. I think you should let her initiate and do a little pursuing and if she doesn't then look elsewhere.

Then again i don't know your culture and I'd in no way let anyone choose my marriage partner so *shrugs*... I still think she's rude.

[smackie9]

If this is how far you have gotten after 5 to 6 months, it's not going to go anywhere..... but that's my opinon.

You want answers you have to ask her why she takes so long to respond. Maybe she really isn't that interested.......but you won't know unless you talk to her about it.

[james_cameron]

Ask your friends if they have any other prospective wives that they could introduce you to. Failing that, tell this one how rude she is and if she's too busy to reply within a reasonable time period then you'd rather be single. Pfffft.

Seriously.. why don't you ask her why she's so rude? Does she know she's suppose to be a potential marriage partner to you? Does she have several men to choose from because she treats you very poorly? I'd not text her again. I think you should let her initiate and do a little pursuing and if she doesn't then look elsewhere.

Then again i don't know your culture and I'd in no way let anyone choose my marriage partner so *shrugs*... I still think she's rude.

My gut feeling is she is also speaking to other potentials as well. From speaking to others that know this girl they have said she knows exactly what she wants and will tell the guy lets remain "friends" if its not working between them.

This is the bit I don't get, why doesn't she just tell me? When she sends me messages they are really nice.

Just don't know what to do.

[smackie9]

Just man the F up and ask her. No sense in being led on for months for nothing.

[james_cameron]

Just man the F up and ask her. No sense in being led on for months for nothing.

I did a couple of weeks ago and she said she would like to get to know me better. Then about 2 texts since then. Should I play hard to get? i.e. only respond to texts she sends me and stop sending her messages?

[smackie9]

In my country the excuse "I would like to get to know you better" usually means you're ok but I'm not that into you. Stop sending messages to her.....she might feel ignored and want your attention. If not walk away.

[Boisdevie]

If this is how far you have gotten after 5 to 6 months, it's not going to go anywhere..... but that's my opinon.

Yep, you should have been shagging each other stupid by now.