I need a little help on a 'crush'

[VeryConfused:S]

Thanks for clicking and viewing this post. I'll try keeping it short. Anyway I am not the best looking guy, I am 15 years old (she is 13), I have a few spots (not many) medium build/large (Size 36 waist), I love drawing, studying Human behaviour (Which is ironic), I am a bit of a computer geek and have a passion for chemistry. She is beautiful, 'fit' (as the kids put it, no offence), loves sports, eating (haha), socializing, drawing and learning. On to my situation,

So there is this girl that I have a massive 'crush' on! I have 'fancied' her for 2 years now and can't find a way to talk to her. She is, literally, perfect in my eyes! We both have the same music taste; we both are artistic and have many common interests. She means so much to me! But it's annoying that she does. I usually see her in school and recently I have been finding it difficult to concentrate.

I am in my final week of high school. As you can imagine, I have been working really hard with my exams and revision. I sit my exams in a classroom on my own because I find being in the hall with everyone else is too intimidating. In my English exam, I started to look out the window and I saw her. I couldn't concentrate. All that was going through my mind was her. I wasn't caring about the exam at hand. I just wanted to go out and talk to her. It is rather frustrating! I want to do well but a 'high school romance' is getting in the way. I had, originally, thought that it was just a moment that would pass. After thinking long and hard all night I came to the conclusion that I don't fancy her, I actually love her! I found this weird because I am just in high school and it's so early on in my life. I see many people who keep having a relationship and then becoming single then 'going out' with someone else; I acknowledge that, that isn't love. They do it for the status and the extra company. With this girl, I actually love her beyond the petty relationships you see our days! I want to be with her; marry her one day but I have a small problem.

I can't really talk to her. We are both similar in some ways but opposite at the same time. She is popular whereas I am not. So she has loads of opportunities with other guys. I am not exactly the most 'fit' or funny or interesting bloke. This leads me to not being able to keep the ball rolling in a conversation. I am rather socially awkward. The only time I have the slightest confidence to speak to her is at night on Facebook, but I can't find the courage to 'pop up' to her. In the past, when I started having these feeling for her, I was able to 'pop up' to her but I found it hard to keep the conversation going. She does know how I feel about her because I got drunk one night, from depression, and posted on her 'Ask.fm' telling her how I feel, how much she means to me and who I am. She was okay with it and never told anyone, to my own knowledge. I would like to talk to her more, see her more, somehow grow a stronger bond to become closer with her and hopefully become more than 'best friends'! But that's me just hoping and dreaming: /

Most nights I feel depressed. I don't go out much and I don't speak to many people, either: / some nights I get really depressed that result into me listening to music and crying. I have seen many therapists that I have not opened up to because I was scared of telling them (I can tell you guys because it's anonymous). I need help on how to talk to her and take it further. I do understand that I am self-conscious and socially awkward. I feel that with the help of her she can change me. Make my life happier. I don't smile much but when I see her I can't stop smiling! God I love her so much! I leave school a week on Friday (14/6/13) so that means I won’t see her. I want to become friends and we can agree to meet up and go out more together and with friends. I have tried many sites for advice but they say that girls look for "bad boys" I am more of the old fashion man. These "bad boys" take them to McDonald's; I take her to a fancy restaurant. See what I mean.

If I was to go out with her I would see her every day, help her with her problems, tell her everything, and treat her to gifts and restaurants. Every night I would ring her up/text her and tell her I love her, how much she means to me and how lucky I am to have her! As you can see I really do love her and really want to be with her. The next weeks without seeing her is going to be unbearable. That's why I need help. Please, please, please can you guys help me? As you can see from my name I am very confused, on the matter. I have studied human behaviour (psychology), which people know about. Many people ask me for relationship advice which, surprisingly, works. However, I don't know what to do when it comes to giving advice to me. That's why I have decided to post.

Well that's my story! Any help will be immensely appreciated! Thanks guys,
VeryConfused:S

[pacachomp]

Social anxiety sounds like the biggest problem you're having. If as far as you know she hasn't told anyone about your feelings for her, and she took it okay, then chances are she's interested in you or at least is a good person, but either way, she's never going to be friendly to you if you can't talk to her. Really the only way through social anxiety is time and forcing yourself to put yourself in social situations which you find uncomfortable.

Talk to her on Facebook, and then say hi to her in real life. Even if you make a complete ass of yourself (and if you're anything like I used to be, there's a reasonable chance of this), you're still giving her a better impression of you than if you don't talk to her. Awkwardness isn't a problem, in fact most girls find it cute so long as you can joke about it and make it less painful.

Good luck, hope things work out for you