Ex acting weird

[Stephyy]

My ex has done loads of weird things since we broke up three months ago- in a break up he initiated after 10 months of being together- but I don't want to go onto too much detail on here because knowing him he would actually find this.

All I want advice on, is over something he's recently done. He tried to chat up my best friend less than a month after we split up but she told him where to go. Since then he's been talking to another of my friends and she's actually falling for him. Both of these friends he's talked to are people who I know but he doesn't... he's only met them a few times in person when I brought him to group outings.

Yesterday, he put a tweet out saying I'd told him I miss him... I haven't talked to him since we broke up.

Straight after we broke up, he told all of his friends that I dealt with it really badly and went crazy with him- this is a lie, I accepted the break up fairly responsively as it was clearly what he wanted.

I'm a bit worried about what he's up to... why is he still making up rumors about me if he's supposedly moving on with someone else? and should I be more open with my friend as to how odd he's actually been, or will that make me look jealous?

[overanxious]

strange behavior indeed...making up a tweet about you saying you missed him lol?? that is crazy....cant really tell you what hes thinking....its also weird hes trying to contact friends of yours that arent really his friends....maybe it says he still loves you and is trying to make you jealous i dunno

my ex has been recently commenting on pictures of my aunt/uncle saying things like "oh i miss you guys so much" and even commenting on a friend of mines status that she really only met 2 or 3 times.....and i find it odd....because we dont speak at all and she knows i hate her...she hates me....i dont read anything into it...but it bothers me because she could just as easily not say anything at all

[Stephyy]

I don't know either, I feel pretty insulted that my friend is interested in him after how badly he treated me and I'm really struggling to think about anything else at the moment as I have so much free time on my hands right now!

wow that's weird too! It doesn't make sense if our exs are acting like this because they still have feelings, surely they'd choose to talk to us and tell us how they felt rather than do weird things to make us angry. I genuinely feel like relationships aren't even worth it after all this. He was my first boyfriend and now I feel so put off for future

[overanxious]

I don't know either, I feel pretty insulted that my friend is interested in him after how badly he treated me and I'm really struggling to think about anything else at the moment as I have so much free time on my hands right now!

wow that's weird too! It doesn't make sense if our exs are acting like this because they still have feelings, surely they'd choose to talk to us and tell us how they felt rather than do weird things to make us angry. I genuinely feel like relationships aren't even worth it after all this. He was my first boyfriend and now I feel so put off for future

same boat here...i feel the same way...i mean not totally...because i realize the immaturity level of my ex and im sure most girls are different...she was so needy for attention and admiration....the type to text and respond within a minute or two(although part of me liked that)....there were parts of her that i loved....like how she would light up when you did something nice for her.....or just the way she was when we went out to eat always wanting to sit next to me and hold my hand... ....i realize shes alot different...i wish i could find someone half like her and half mature and responsible......she too was my first love...the first time i opened up and let someone in

my ex has moved on and in "love" im sure.....i firmly believe shell always have some kind of feelings for someone she spent so much time with.....things she misses about me...i dont expect her to come to me and say it.....i just wonder what the point is on commenting on my relatives and friends statuses....when she could just as easily just go right by them......and same for you....what is this guy trying to prove?

[VerticalMoon]

He sounds kind of messed up. Maybe he thinks that people will find him more attractive if there's a girl pining over him. Rather than worry about why he's behaving this way, I think you should just be grateful that you're no longer with this loser.

As for telling your friend, I think it really depends on how you think she'll react. If she's somebody who would be considerate and thank you for the warning, then I'd say tell her. She might still ignore you, but at least you'll know you've done the considerate thing by giving her the heads up. On the other hand, if you think she would give you a hard time about it, then I wouldn't bother. You're not obligated to subject yourself to that for somebody else's sake.

Don't give up on love because of one bad relationship. There are plenty of good people out there. Just try to be more cautious with who you choose to date next time and don't get too serious until you know what type of a person you're dealing with.

[overanxious]

He sounds kind of messed up. Maybe he thinks that people will find him more attractive if there's a girl pining over him. Rather than worry about why he's behaving this way, I think you should just be grateful that you're no longer with this loser.

As for telling your friend, I think it really depends on how you think she'll react. If she's somebody who would be considerate and thank you for the warning, then I'd say tell her. She might still ignore you, but at least you'll know you've done the considerate thing by giving her the heads up. On the other hand, if you think she would give you a hard time about it, then I wouldn't bother. You're not obligated to subject yourself to that for somebody else's sake.

Don't give up on love because of one bad relationship. There are plenty of good people out there. Just try to be more cautious with who you choose to date next time and don't get too serious until you know what type of a person you're dealing with.

most important advice you gave....dont get too serious unitl you know what type of person you are dealing with.....most important...and something to be learned...unfortunately some of us get taken away by first loves.....but what you said is so true

[Stephyy]

Yeah you're right, I feel like I've learnt a lot from what's happened and so I guess it's helped me for future! I don't think I'm going to say anything to my friend- she should know from what I've told her in the past that he's a little bit crazy and not relationship material... I'll just let it be! Thanks for all your advice

[4 ratties]

Ignoring him and telling your "friends" to eff off is the way to go

[Stephyy]

ugh guys I'd appreciate some more advice please.

I have a blog that I used to have linked to my twitter account when I was with my ex boyfriend, but when we split up I took it off twitter because I didn't want him going on it. I don't post about relationships- just funny things that happen to me throughout my everyday life!

Anyway, I have a tracker which tells me roughly where people who view my blog live, how often they go on it, how they got onto it, and which sections they look at in detail. He was still managing to get on my blog after we split up so I changed my url so he wouldn't be able to. He'd gone to the trouble of saving one of my friend's blogs somewhere so still managed to get onto mine from hers! We both changed our urls, and he hadn't been on since... until yesterday- he's managed to get onto it again by going through another friends blog and someone else's until he's eventually found me.

Part of me thinks I should just leave it because he's not doing any harm by looking and if it wasn't for me having that tracker I would never know! But at the same time, I really don't like it, I don't think it's healthy for him to be looking and I feel more self-conscious about what I post when I know he is.

I don't want to talk to him about it- I can't stand the idea of doing so after everything he's done! I'm willing to delete my blog completely but I don't feel that I should have to go to such measures. Part of me thinks I should delete the tracker because if I'm not careful I'll end up stalking his stalking! I don't know what to do for the best.

[VerticalMoon]

This is why I never clicked on those Facebook ads that say they will tell you who's been looking at your Facebook page and how often. I don't really want to know who's looking me up on-line. While part of me is curious, the bigger part is worried that I'd find out things I'd rather not know about.

If I was you, I'd get rid of the tracker. If he wants to look you up, that's his issue to deal with. You shouldn't be concerned what he's doing with it. Having the tracker would probably just be too much temptation to check what he's doing. If you're self-conscious now that you know he's looking you might also want to take a break from posting for a while.

At least this possibly answers the question of why he was trying to get close to your friends. It's likely he was trying to find a way to get more information about you again.

[VincenzoG91]

Stephyy, you're making this situation hard on yourself when it should be easy. He is your ex. You're not required to give a shit about him anymore. The end.

[Stephyy]

ah yeah, I have a tendency to over-think things that really shouldn't matter anymore. I'll delete the tracker and tell my friends to stop telling me every time he says something untrue about me. Thanks again everyone, I really appreciate your advice!

[MelanieLouise]

Very strange behaviour, just ignore him. You know the truth as do those people in your life who really matter.

[michelle23]

he was prob upset that you didn't cling to him like a vine and cry while screaming "please dont leave me". it prob bruised his ego that you said "fine" and walked away. Give yourself a pat on the back hun. You got dumped but hes the one still craving your attention. Now all you gotta do is act completely indifferent like you really dont give a s**t. Its his loss and you can do better. Dont even bother trying to warn your friend about him, it will just make you look jealous which is what he wants. Let her make her own mistakes-shes a big girl. Just move on with your life, forget about him-he has issues and start dating again.

Best of luck