A couple of friends

[loveagain]

This involves a couple of friends, Jack and Katie. Katie has been in a relationship for 10 years but always complains about it, her BF not committing to marry her, etc. Jack has been chasing Katie for years, but never gotten very far. Lately Katie has complained to me a few times that she wants Jack to stop pursuing her, says she likes him as a friend but wants him to stop asking her out, etc. Last weekend we were at a party (all 3 of us) and I spent a lot of time talking one-on-one with Katie and she said the same thing again, and the next day in a text.

Last night Katie went on a date with her BF for the first time in a month. (she pretty much admits that she only stays with him because he has money) Apparently it did not go well, so who does she call for a shoulder to cry on? Jack. They were on the phone together until well into the morning (he told me, was FB with me while they were talking.) He is now convinced that he has an opening to play and get close to her.

My feeling is that this is classic friend-zone behavior on her part. On the other hand, I know from my (albeit limited) personal experience that being there to pick up the pieces when a friend is hurting is a time honored, effective way to move from just-friends to hookup or full blown relationship (if you're cool with catching the rebound.) I also know that people will say they aren't interested in someone when they really are.

Opinions? It seems that if Katie really has no interest in Jack she needs to stop giving out signals that he has a chance (they text frequently, and sometimes meet up for drinks, then she complains to me that she wants him to stop). Of course, she may just crave the attention.

[DiiFMaritime]

That's an interesting one and I think I agree with you, but

Part of me thinks Jack wants Katie so much that he will see anything as Katie giving him signals. Part of me thinks Katie enjoys it - it is always nice to know someone else is attracted to you and if she truely wants Jack to stop trying to hook up with her then she would have told him outright to stop