Is she too far gone?

[wannamate]

Good afternoon. I have a girl whom I have been acquainted with for the past 3 and a half months. I asked her to be my girlfriend on May 8 of this year. We instantly hit it off and things have been wonderful. BTW...this is a long distance relationship. we stay roughly 175 miles away from each other in two different states. So we get to see each other maybe two weekends a month or more if we are willing. For a while, we were very sweet with each other. Always telling each other how we felt about each other, very affectionate with each other enjoyed doing some things together when were together. One time she cam to my house for Memorial Day Weekend. I guess she may have sensed tension between us. We did not cuddle while watching television or anything. But we still had fun. We went to bed and nothing happened. We got up the next morning and it was kind of dry, but we created a little fire before she left for home. She called me on her trip back and we discussed it and I admitted that I let some family issues get in the way of me being intimate with her and not talking. We also used to talk on the phone roughly 4 to five hours day. When June came around, I noticed that we were starting to struggle talking on the phone for very long. We saw each other a few more time in June and things went very well between us. Jumping forward, we were together last week when she came up to go to a concert with me and and spend the 4th with me. The show was great and we went back to her room and nothing happened. She would not kiss me because she said we both had bad breath and she does not like that. I went home and she called me the next morning to make up for last night, but I had gotten wrapped up in a fight with a family member and was so mad I was not thinking of getting with her. I got to her room in time to get her when she checked out and she could tell I was pissed. We went to my family's house and it seemed like things were okay. But since then, things have gone downhill. We talked about the issues on Friday night and she concluded that she expects to feel loved when we get together again. She was hurt due to a lack of affection. She has been distant with me this entire week. She barely tells me she loves me. I MUST say it to her first and then she may say it or she may not. She has not gotten an attitude with me at all. She takes longer to respond to my texts, but she still responds in a positive manner. She has not broken up with me, and she has not changed her status on Facebook. So we are technically still together. I REALLY want to make things up and give her affection like she has never had before. I AM an affectionate man. I just had a couple of situations where things got in the way. She really wanted affection from me. I am going down to see her tomorrow. Also, we have not talked on the phone for the first time for 3 days straight. Do you think that she is too far gone. Do you think I still have a chance to revive her love for me? I know it cant be gone in a week and I feel she is worth fighting for.

[sadbunnyface]

Can I ask is it only her traveling to see you? In your story it looks that way, but help if you rotate traveling weekends, if you don't already do so. Well, in fairness to her she is traveling to spend a lovely time with you and at least two times you were moody and not into being as loving with her because your family issues were bothering you, did you let her know it wasn't her and what was going on with you and your family?

Her telling you this, " and she concluded that she expects to feel loved when we get together again. She was hurt due to a lack of affection." No mystery for you, guys are so lucky women are expressive with what is hurting them, because we always seem to tell the ones we loved so they know how to fix the issues. Sounds like something more is upsetting her. I think she is waiting for the next visit to happen and to see how you make it a better time for her and you, before she says anything definite to you. So plan something wonderful, or go up to see her, and don't get caught up in other squabbles.

Try being open with what you are feeling for her, that will help. Ok, read you ARE going to see her this time. So that should take your family out of the situation?
Yes, if she is okay with you going to visit she isn't too far gone. But you will have to give her what she told you she needed from you, and listen to her.

Hope all goes well for you both.

[wannamate]

Thanks. We usually alternate visits with each other. I AM going to do just that. She okay the visit for me to come. And I have gotten the outside interference gone form my life. Thanks so much for the advice.

[michelle23]

Ask yourself can you have a future with this girl? Is one of you willing to relocate in the next year or two in order to be together properly? It is very hard to maintain a relationship when you are not having regular contact and you may just have to accept that you are both wasting your time here

Plus I think the fact you spend so little time together-she expects too much from you when you do get together-you cant just be yourself coz you have to worry about impressing her each time which is bull really.

If she lived near by you wouldnt have to tiptoe around each other coz you would already feel comfortable together by now. As for her refusing to kiss you-I think that is messed up-she could have just gotten a chewing gum..