Communication in a Long Distance Relationship

[ajny56]

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for about a month before we went into a long distance relationship due to school ending. Its only 3 months that we will be apart so I am thinking nothing of it. However, problems started when I feel like she always wants to talk to me. She wanted to Skype me twice a day. Once in the morning and once in the evening.

After one morning Skype session, I gave up because it was such a demand to get up that early so I compromised and told her I will text her in the morning and we can text throughout the day and then Skype at night. That worked for a while until we slowly ran out of things to talk about. I simply became bored with talking with her and wanted to enjoy my own personal life with my friends until the summer ended.

She noticed that I started talking less with her and started becoming hostile with me saying that I never want to talk with her, and that she feels that shes alone in feeling emptiness cause she misses me(basically she thinks that she misses me and I don't miss her). But I just want to enjoy my summer. We're in different states and to put it simply she's not the only one in my life. I go out and have fun and whenever I ask what she did during the day she tells me she was home all day. I can't help it if you have no life outside of me, but I want to enjoy myself and we can talk every now and then until the summer is over, but I cant take the constant skype's and texting and phone calls.

One time we were skyping and I had nothing to say so I went to watch TV while I left the camera facing me. Every time I looked at the Skype she was just staring at me doing nothing else. It was kind of awkward cause I'm watching TV and she is just staring at me. I asked her why and she wouldn't answer. She just said she likes looking at me. But the whole time she was just eyeing me with a little smile, saying nothing. It was very creepy. Anyways am I wrong in feeling that she wants to talk to me too much. She kind of feels really clingy at the moment and its getting annoying. Other than all this we have a great time when we are together. This all started when we left each other for the summer.

[lalalita]

*sigh* Break up with her so she can be with a man who actually wants to be in a relationship.

[ajny56]

*sigh* Break up with her so she can be with a man who actually wants to be in a relationship.

See, I only noticed this after we left each other. When were together, we talk all the time, go on dates, and always together and it doesn't bother me. Only now after were not together, she wants to talk with me 24/7 and I just cant handle that. And I must add that I hate texting period. I tend to not use my phone and much rather talk in person. I told her this and she didn't comprehend how I didnt like texting. Mind you, she is on her phone texting all the time.

[basilandthyme]

See, I only noticed this after we left each other. When were together, we talk all the time, go on dates, and always together and it doesn't bother me. Only now after were not together, she wants to talk with me 24/7 and I just cant handle that. And I must add that I hate texting period. I tend to not use my phone and much rather talk in person. I told her this and she didn't comprehend how I didnt like texting. Mind you, she is on her phone texting all the time.

That's because in real life, having you around fulfils her needs for a relationship. Don't under estimate what companionship and physical touch adds to a relationship. However, while it's long distance, her needs aren't being fulfilled, hence her trying to get them met using other methods.

[michelle23]

You are either committed to this girl or your not. If you want to be with her-make the effort. Ignoring her and watching TV is just plain rude while she is still online.

How far away from her are you? Can you take turns to go and see each other once a week or once every two weeks? You need regular contact to keep your relationship strong.

If you are fed up with her-then just do the right thing and end it. That is what it sounds like to me. Dont string her along as shes obviously crazy about you but you dont seem too bothered.

[ajny56]

You are either committed to this girl or your not. If you want to be with her-make the effort. Ignoring her and watching TV is just plain rude while she is still online.

How far away from her are you? Can you take turns to go and see each other once a week or once every two weeks? You need regular contact to keep your relationship strong.

If you are fed up with her-then just do the right thing and end it. That is what it sounds like to me. Dont string her along as shes obviously crazy about you but you dont seem too bothered.

We are basically across the county. Its going to be near impossible to visit each other unless I spend a slew of money on plane tickets. I don't understand how I was rude for leaving her on Skype. I didn't necessarily leave her. She was just staring at me for a good 5 minutes. I could have sworn the camera froze so I told her I was just going to watch some TV and she said ok while she was staring at me. Every now and then she would laugh and what not at me but she was just staring at me like I was just some kind of TV show. It was just awkward. And again our relationship is near perfect when we are together, and we are only going to be apart for one more month so what the point in breaking up.

[michelle23]

coz if you are not meeting her emotional needs-some other guy will. the distance is too hard and she will feel very hurt and lonely if you dont make the effort. You could make skyping more fun, have some cybersex, ask her to dress up for you etc.

try to enjoy spending time online with her at least once a day.

And a few texts or phonecalls throughout the day will do you good