Erectile dysfunction... :(

[HDBadger]

I didn't say it was a gender thing.

And yes, an unattractive woman will kill a guy's erection faster than a corpse. I don't expect you to understand this because you're not a guy. With the exception of men who can actually feel attraction to corpses (obviously a minuscule number), the majority of guys don't see a corpse as anything sexual - good or bad. But a live woman who isn't what a guy likes physically will generate an immediate reaction that is the opposite of getting turned on. Instant boner killer.

It's a ridiculous example to begin with though, because I'm assuming we want to discuss scenarios that might actually affect the OP in his lifetime.

[jnickjohns]

So this isn't that uncommon?

Exactly. The main thing to remember is these things happen to everyone--it's how they're handled that's important.

If I freaked out and asked what was going on, or if there was something wrong with me it wouldn't help the situation. He'd be extremely embarrassed and reserved, maybe hesitate to want to have sex the next time, and neither of us wants that!

Let me ask you, do you feel turned on but just not have an erection?

[searock]

I didn't say it was a gender thing.

And yes, an unattractive woman will kill a guy's erection faster than a corpse. I don't expect you to understand this because you're not a guy. With the exception of men who can actually feel attraction to corpses (obviously a minuscule number), the majority of guys don't see a corpse as anything sexual - good or bad. But a live woman who isn't what a guy likes physically will generate an immediate reaction that is the opposite of getting turned on. Instant boner killer.

It's a ridiculous example to begin with though, because I'm assuming we want to discuss scenarios that might actually affect the OP in his lifetime.

Hm I don't think a lot of men would agree with this theory. I mean it's one thing to not be able to get turned on if you aren't attracted to someone, but to actually lose an erection more easily by simply seeing an unattractive person than by seeing something really nasty/disturbing, I don't think so. I do believe that it works that way for you eh, I'm not saying you're lying. I just don't think it works like that for most persons.

Yeah, it's pretty unrelated to the topic at hand, we can close the parenthesis :-).

[unknowngirl]

Seeing a psychologist that specialises in sexual health/sexual dysfunction, or a sexual health counsellor would help for sure.
It is obviously something that is bothering you, and I know your pretty hard on yourself from some of your past comments. working on your view of yourself and your self-esteem would help for sure. There is not need to be ashamed, I am sure its a lot more normal then you think. feeling down and ashamed of yourself will act as a mental barrier. doesn't matter if it porn or a gorgeous women in front of you, if your worried that you wont or cant get it up, its not going to happen. go see someone. work through some of the mental barriers that you have, and don't be so hard on yourself. it will only make it worse.

[YoungCosmo]

Exactly. The main thing to remember is these things happen to everyone--it's how they're handled that's important.

If I freaked out and asked what was going on, or if there was something wrong with me it wouldn't help the situation. He'd be extremely embarrassed and reserved, maybe hesitate to want to have sex the next time, and neither of us wants that!

Let me ask you, do you feel turned on but just not have an erection?

All the time! Ever since the first time we did it, I've been more....energized! Sadly, it doesn't culminate in hard erections though..

[searock]

YC, what's the point of this thread if you're not going to take the advice and go see a doctor?

[Wakeup]

*peeks in* ^^^ *waits for answer*

[dem862]

I hear the priesthood is looking for a few good men.

[Wakeup]

*laughing here*

[IndiReloaded]

Oh ffs YC you are the epitome of neurotic. It's PA. Go see your medico, but all he's going to do is stab your arm, take some tests, say you are fine except you need to learn to relax and enjoy yourself. You tear from one crisis to the next... having a GF you enjoy being with isn't a crisis.

Go for a hard run or something before you meet your GF. You have to burn off the useless nervous energy. Then **** her brains out and enjoy.

[YoungCosmo]

This isn't with a girlfriend, which may be a part of the problem. I have decided to see a doctor to ascertain whether it is a physical issue. I just remembered I used to take anti-depressants and quit without being directed to..Might this be the genesis?

[IndiReloaded]

I just remembered I used to take anti-depressants and quit without being directed to..Might this be the genesis?

No. You just need to learn to relax, kiddo. Wish I knew how to help you. I am pretty Type A and was majorly wound up for years.

The only thing I know that will 'cure' you of this is for life to hit you so hard with stuff you have no choice but to find some perspective. Look for examples in your life of successful, 'seasoned' people. If you look and listen carefully to them, you will understand that they aren't any less busy than anyone else (in fact if you want something done well, ask a busy person), they have just found a way to manage the stress. Small things don't phase us, and problems are just things to quickly solve so you can get on with the interesting stuff.