Still missing her after years

[Larson0109]

So, i will try to keep this post as small as possible but cant guarantee it. 3 years ago i started a relationship with a beautiful,intelligent and independent woman who i loved dearly. 10 months later i felt kinda down had some trouble at home and decided to have a night out with my buddies, i drank way too much that night and kissed some random girl i met at the club. the second after the kiss i felt regret and felt really stupid. i hate people who cheat and my previous girlfriend cheated on me so i knew how much it would hurt her, but still i cheated. the morning after i decided to tell her and so i did. she was mad and sad but decided to stay with me. For me things were like when we first started dating i felt in love but she just couldn't trust me anymore and kept thinking about my mistake. this resulted in us breaking up on valentines day.

i decided to try to forget about her as soon as possible, so i deleted her on Facebook and ignored her. some weeks later i see her at a party kissing with some other guy. even though i know she was allowed to kiss and that i shouldn't be mad, i was really mad and disappointed. that same moment a good friend of her approached me and started to dance with me and we kissed. her friend didn't tell her and i tried to not tell her but every time i saw her somewhere i wanted to tell her. so eventually i told her and she got really mad. i became the asshole who cheated on the sweetest and most beautiful girl, called her horrible things for kissing a guy when she was single and kissed a good friend of her.

now 2 years later i have a new girlfriend who i love very much and who doesn't do a thing wrong. but somehow i cant seem to forget about my ex. She was perfect at that time and i loved her a lot. And now i am in a relationship with another great girl but cant seem to forget about my ex. my ex was a girl i almost looked up to, she was how i wanted my future wife to be like. and the problem is i am comparing my new relation with my previous one. and even though i don't want to do so i keep doing it.

i hope some of u guys have ideas on how to get over my ex? its been almost 2 years now since we broke up. i always thought it would be a matter of time but clearly its not in this case.

Thanks for reading my post!

[Ginger2013]

Well, the only thing I can say is you're not being fair to the current gf if you keep pining over the ex. You do realize that if you keep doing the mental comparisons and living in the past that you will never be happy because you'll never find a suitable gf. You have to find a way to let go, I've never pined over an ex for very long before so I can't offer any suggestion on how except just get over it. You have to allow yourself to be happy with your new gf, you obviously still hold guilt over the way you acted with the ex, but I'll bet she's way over you by now.

[michelle23]

You should try to see it as a positive now. By being with her you learned what type of woman you want to marry. You learned more about yourself and what not to do in the future in relationships. You grew from that experience and know for sure now what you want. Its pointless looking back and saying what if. You need to forgive yourself and move on. And tell yourself it didnt work out coz u were not right for each other.

If you cant get past this and stop comparing your girl to your ex then you need to break up with her and get some counselling.