New girl gave me surprising information today!

[Simpo]

So I have recently been chatting a lot to this girl and we are considering taking things to a new level and start a relationship. She lives 200 miles away which is a bit of a bitch but she is amazing and love talking to her and have booked a train down next week to see her. Today we were chatting on the phone and she decided to tell me that she was ENGAGED to her ex boyfriend of 2 years (on-off relationship).

They split up in January this year and he has text her more than a few times and said that he still loves her and wants to marry her and all this other stuff. He also also threatened to commit suicide and all this other nonsense too. She broke up with him since he was playing her and chatting to other girls and just being a "player" as they say. She has said that she doesn't think she will ever get back with him and says that I am 100x better than her ex. But just the fact she said "think" rather than "I will never go out with him again" just put some thoughts into my head.

This has really gave me a lot to think about. I still want to go see her and spend time with her but this new information just keeps running though my mind. The fact she is 200 miles away and lives in the same town as her ex and I'm so far away also crosses my mind.

What do you guys think? Should I be worried or what should I be thinking about this?

Additional info: She is 17, the ex was her first love/relationship, she was young and considers him and the engagment a mistake, I really care about this girl

[smackie9]

This whole thing says fail all over it. One she has ex BF bagage, two you live 200 miles apart...how the hell are you going to date someone that is 200 miles away. Thirdly, the ex has access to her 24-7 and you don't.

You are wasting your time with this whole ordeal and you should never invest your feelings with someone you have never met before.

Seriously are you that flippin desperate for a GF? She's only 17 for Christ's sake, she is too young to know what she wants.

[namemyname]

Who gets engaged at 17??? I think it all speaks more to her maturity level than anything.

Anyway, Simpo - you would have the same concerns with anyone so far away, regardless of what they reveal.

I vote to find someone local. At 17, I don't see how she's able to travel to date you, assuming she lives at home.

[Kromat83]

She will like your attention, but she is also getting that from her ex that lives closer.
Don't you have better things to do, then spend time talking to someone that you will barely see?
This whole thing will be a waste of time, because until your around 24, you still don't know what you want in life.
How old are you by the way to waste time and money on her ?
P.S. think of the long term effects this will have on you, learn from not getting involved and find a local girl.

[michelle23]

I agree with the others. Shes too young for you and she lives too far away. Not sure if the ex is a threat since the split 8months ago. If she hasnt been with him since then at all then i dont see an issue with that

[Boisdevie]

Find someone nearer to home to shag - preferably someone who isn't really dim.

[4 ratties]

Have sex with her and then don't talk to her ever again

[pcmaster]

Really man I agree with Kromat. Think about how much fuel you gona burn in longterm. If she wants to visit you okay but its not worth the petrol except if the sex is good.