Ex gf problem

[flashrock]

I moved out from a girl that treated me great 9 months ago, She has a big drug problem. We saw each other for three months then she abruptly stopped returning my calls. Fine- I thought of her sometimes the last six months but was moving on. I have not dated again- which is unusual for me. Anyway- last week I stopped at a friend's house I have not seen for a while, He said my ex gf stops there sometimes and hangs out. She told him she was mad our relationship did not work and that I bailed out on her, He said she has not dated anyone. This information made me miss her immensely- plus I was a little jealous. SO i called her numerous times until she returned my call. She confirmed what my friend said. We have talked the last few days but she gives me little time on the phone- "I'm busy-I got to do things." She says. She told me she had a romantic dream about me the first day we talked (probably because I called her 15 times the night before! Something I really don't do) I said we should hang out. She said maybe, The next day she was reluctant. The next day she said maybe after she takes care of her house. (there was a fire) She eventually hung up on me because she said she was busy. She said things like- I think of you sometimes- I am moving forward- you are not my best friend now- etc. But she has returned my calls four days in a row, Fairly quickly. I did not call her today.

Ok- I will state her drug use is still going on. But I want to see her - even if it is just as friends. I have always thought of maybe re-establishing contact and I realized a whole six months have gone by without us talking!

My question is:
1- what do people think of her statements to me.
2-What if I just stop by her house sometime soon? Is that weird?

Oh- don't tell me she is not worth it because of the drugs. I am already aware of that problem. Part of me wants to make up====but I just seeing her in person seems important to me. She has no reason to hate me or fear me. I have lots of anxiety because of all this- it is worse than when I first left her! Thanks for the comments people!

[4 ratties]

So you have feelings for her still and were almost over her, but now u want to be "friends" with her. Not a good idea at all. This is just going to prolong getting over her which is not productive. It doesn't sound like she wants to get back together so your only hurting yourself.

[sajib]

The best way is to follow your heart, if you some part of you still want to see her then why not stopping over to her house? She maybe waiting for that and the fact that you are not doing it! maybe that is why she is also behaving like that.

[TheEvilJester]

I would say you shouldn't get mixed up with somebody having drug problems, but I see that you already know that but still want her in your life. So, I won't go on any further about that. However, I certainly cannot speak for everybody (nor can I speak for this gal of yours) but I personally am NOT a fan of the pop-in. I DO NOT like somebody just "showing up" at my home. To me, unless you live with me, there is no reason to just stop by my home. You don't know what I could be doing. Maybe I had a frustrating day and just need some time to unwind and be left alone. Maybe I am sick that day. Heck, maybe I'm wearing a pink tutu while dancing and singing show tunes. (Just a crazy example, cuz... you know... I totally don't do that. LOL!)

So, maybe it is just me, but my personal recommendation would not be to just stop by. If you really do want to get together with her, ask her out for a cup of coffee or something. Do you want to just be friends for now, or do you want a relationship? That could dictate what you ask her to do and how you ask. If you just want to be friends right now, for example, ask her out for a cup of coffee, or for lunch or something just to talk. Either way good luck.