How to convince him it wasn't me.

[bananazyay]

Hello... I just got out of a relationship that didn't last very long however it was a really good relationship and we were all ready talking about being a family and finding a bigger house, we really loved each other... at least... I know I did. So this is where it began. The guy I love was with a girl for 3 years and let's just say shes a bit ... not so good... the relationship was very bad and landed them in legal trouble, especially the guy I'm in love with. Him, his ex, and everyone else have told me he never did anything wrong to her and that it was all her who did it, even she broke down admitting it. Well anyway they aren't supposed to communicate with each other at all. Not even talk on the phone. Well being the good hearted person he is when his ex got kicked out from where she was staying last week he took her in to stay with us and boy did I get angry. I told him I didn't trust him and I even said something a bit worse that I didn't mean because I know he would never hurt anyone. The trust thing yes I meant it at the time because how was I supposed to feel with her being back in the picture and living with us of all things? other then that I trusted him. Well after I said those things he kicked me out and I was staying with a few friends that we both knew for a few days. The second day of me staying with them we went to the house to pack my things and we left. We got back to their apartment and were watching movies and I don't really know what time it started for sure but I think it was like 10 at night we got a phone call from them saying that the police were over at the house. Our friend was texting him and his ex about what was going on and they said they were afraid to go to the house so they just drove by while they thought about what to do and when they said that the police pulled out of the drive way and followed them for a bit then pulled them over... When I found that out my heart sank I thought they were going to jail and I thought I was going to lose him forever... well the police didn't really do anything that I know of unless hes not telling me the whole story. They made them separate, she stayed at the house for a few days and he went to stay with family. They were so lucky that that's all that happened and honestly I don't know if it's going to be taken any further, however they have been saying that the police have been surveying the house 24hrs a day and so he can't go back to the house even though she's supposedly left. Now here's the thing... They think it was me... I may be heart broken right now but I love this guy. We were going to be a family me, him, his son, my son, we were happy... I don't understand how they think it was me when they know how much I care about him. If you truly love somebody you would not put them in harms way and you sure as heck don't call the cops on them when you're hoping to get back together, especially when you know that the outcome will be even worse then the current situation. I did warn him that he shouldn't around her and I honestly think that plays into him thinking it's me but that was me trying to refresh his memory on how badly this can end.. and look at what happened... I'm really confused... I love him so very much I would not hurt him as much as I fear for him being involved with her again calling the cops would have just made it so much worse...like it is now. So here's something else, they keep trying to say that the police were describing the person to be me who called them, first off when someone calls the cops on someone else don't the cops make it anonymous out of the safety of the person who called and who ever did it I'm sure weren't dumb enough to tell the connection or for goodness sake describe themselves to the cops, yeah the cops would be able to tell if its a girl/guy and the mood they seem to be in but I really don't think the cops would do such a thing, secondly like I said they are saying the cops described me, a upset younger girl who used to live in the house with him that he recently broke up with, yeah... huge huge lie the only way the cops would have said that is if his ex is trying to set me up in which I've really been leaning towards that if the cops really did describe me, why on earth would I tell them who I am or anything, aside from that why would I do it in the first place. There are a lot of people that I think could have done it but no one is going to come forward and a lot of stuff adds up when I think about certain people or situations that caused this. But I did not do it and I want him to realize it, he won't speak to me or anything, right now I don't even know who he is. There is a lot more going on right now, long story but I haven't lived in this state long and some other stuff happened with a recent ex that I was with for 3 years myself, he was a bad person like my love's ex. Well right now I'm staying with him and his family and I think later today he's going to try to drop me off at a shelter again, this is really hurting him to the point that he's going to do something so drastic. I need help and answers any opinion on what to do to get him to believe me. I'm at a complete loss... he think's I'm out to destroy him when it wasn't even me....oh I woke up a few hours ago looking for him and heard through the door his ex saying something on the phone about getting me arrested... what on earth could they get me arrested for I haven't done anything, she said something about I'm going to get arrested for lying, what have I lied about and even if it was me and I lied to them about this how on earth would that get me arrested? I honestly don't think he loves me anymore over this... and even if he doesn't I need him to at least believe me

[searock]

Try splitting your wall of text into paragraphs, it will make it easier to read. You might also try to summarize a bit.

[michelle23]

Its easy for him to blame 3 years of hell on her but he stayed with her.. There are so many red flags here but your ignoring them coz your looking at him through rose tinted glasses.

You need to go home to family and sort your life out. Learn to be independent and get a job. Look after your child and stop depending on men to look after you.

This is so unhealthy for your child. Moving from house to house, from one man to another and possibily ending up in a shelter. Do you want your kid to go into care? Coz thats what will happen if you dont stop this now!

The men you are attracting are messed up. They see your vulnerable and are taking advantage. Its time to grow up and do whats right for your kid. Stay away from men until you sort your life out

[smackie9]

Ummm you are not very bright are you? This guy is a total douche. He only cares about his ex obviously, but you remain a doormat for him to walk on. You can't have your dream family...that is over. Grab some self worth, go home to your family and stay out of this guy's life.


This environment is not right for your kid....so stop thinking about your own desires, and finally put your son first for a change.