Crushing on a girl for years...

[TheEvilJester]

You could be right. For the record, I am pretty anti-social. I mean, not to the point where I wouldn't ever want people talking to me, but if you aren't a close friend, I would NOT want you calling me. Of course, therefore you wouldn't have my phone number in the first place.

Still, for the sake of argument, I will pretend for a minute that I did have my phone number on Facebook. If somebody called me without my consent, I personally would find that very rude. If they were somebody I actually did want to hear from, I'd probably let it slide, but I would still think to myself "why would somebody do that without asking me?"

Though, again, that could just be me. I am suppose I am not all that in touch with what "normal" people do. LOL!

[MMX]

Ehh.... you guys may be right, but I'm not so sure myself. I mean, I definitely agree she shouldn't put her phone number on her Facebook profile if she doesn't want friends to use it and call her. Personally, I would never put my phone number on my Facebook profile. If I want somebody to have my phone number, they have my phone number. I don't want random friends on Facebook to have it.

Still, I think it would be a bit rude to just go ahead and call somebody without them actually specifically giving your their number and saying it is okay to call. But, I don't know if maybe that is just me.

I do, however, agree that the OP should consider just asking her out. I can see if you want to build up to it a little by talking to her through Facebook a bit. Just don't spend too much time building up to it. At some point, if you want to ask her out, you'll have to just come up with a way to do it, and just go for it. She'll say yes, or she'll say no, but at least then you will know. Either way, good luck, my friend.

Yeah that is exactly my point. It's not like I don't want to do it but more like I don't want it to be random and just invading her comfort space. I didn't realize but you can have your phone number on facebook automatically without even knowing it. The only way you do hide it is by going into the privacy setting and just like you I think I'm the last person who'd want their number on facebook to some randoms too.

PS: You aren't anti-social buddy lol, you and I are on the same page as you. I've tried being direct before, wasn't always the best option.

Jesus Christ! It's just a fvcking phone call

Maybe it's just I come from a different time when girls thought it was sweet for a guy to call out of the blue for a date. We didn't have FB, texts or even answering machines.....I remember when the phone range, you just picked it up and said "hello". And I'm only 44.

Some people are very direct and quick whilst some take their time. The approach depends on the type of person whose being asked out. If you're too direct you come across as a player and too strong sometimes whilst others might find it sexy in some way. I've tried it in the past and it hasn't always worked.

[surfhb2]

Yeah that is exactly my point. It's not like I don't want to do it but more like I don't want it to be random and just invading her comfort space. I didn't realize but you can have your phone number on facebook automatically without even knowing it. The only way you do hide it is by going into the privacy setting and just like you I think I'm the last person who'd want their number on facebook to some randoms too.

PS: You aren't anti-social buddy lol, you and I are on the same page as you. I've tried being direct before, wasn't always the best option.



Some people are very direct and quick whilst some take their time. The approach depends on the type of person whose being asked out. If you're too direct you come across as a player and too strong sometimes whilst others might find it sexy in some way. I've tried it in the past and it hasn't always worked.

OK....whatever wuss puss.....just make sure you ask her out. Im sure she will appreciate you took your sweet time

[TheEvilJester]

PS: You aren't anti-social buddy lol, you and I are on the same page as you. I've tried being direct before, wasn't always the best option.

Oh, no, I'm VERY anti-social. LOL! Well... except amongst friends. Actually, it's a little weird. Almost like I am two entirely different people.

But, I am glad to know that this is one thing that is not overly anti-social about me, then, since you agree with me. ;-) And I definitely hear you on not wanting to come across seeming like a "player." You and I share that concern as well. That's always been one of the things that most concerns me about asking a girl out. I don't want to look like just one of a million scumbags who ask her out. If/when I ever actually get up the nerve to ask a girl out, it is because I REALLY want to ask her out, not just that she is female and breathing. LOL!

All the same, you don't want to wait too long. I agree with not jumping right in there out of the blue, but also don't let it go too long. Good luck, either way! I hope it works out for you.

[surfhb2]

Oh, no, I'm VERY anti-social. LOL! Well... except amongst friends. Actually, it's a little weird. Almost like I am two entirely different people.

But, I am glad to know that this is one thing that is not overly anti-social about me, then, since you agree with me. ;-) And I definitely hear you on not wanting to come across seeming like a "player." You and I share that concern as well. That's always been one of the things that most concerns me about asking a girl out. I don't want to look like just one of a million scumbags who ask her out. If/when I ever actually get up the nerve to ask a girl out, it is because I REALLY want to ask her out, not just that she is female and breathing. LOL!

All the same, you don't want to wait too long. I agree with not jumping right in there out of the blue, but also don't let it go too long. Good luck, either way! I hope it works out for you.

No offense at all but this is why you don't have many dates and is the reason why I'm telling the op to do differently

I was the same way when I was young . Not sure why the op thinks calling her makes him look like a player ? Lol

[TheEvilJester]

No offense at all but this is why you don't have many dates and is the reason why I'm telling the op to do differently

I was the same way when I was young . Not sure why the op thinks calling her makes him look like a player ? Lol

Actually, none taken. You are probably right. Still, I don't know how to change that about me. I'm not the type to just go around asking random girls out. I mean, I'm not saying I have to know them for years or anything. I'm not even against asking out a girl I don't even really know just because she looks/seems like a girl I may be interested in dating. Hell, if she actually said yes, but wound up being somebody I can't see myself being serious with, then we just don't proceed with the relationship. No harm there. I'm just saying I don't just go up to any random girl I can find and ask them all out hoping at least one of them will say yes.

[surfhb2]

I hear ya.....but this is not a random girl In the OPs situation

[BurritoBandito]

You know it's to early to call if they answer and it takes them a minute to remember you. I wouldn't call her. I would message her on Facebook, ask if it's okay to use your phone number to text. If she says yes, go ahead and talk for a while, then call. If at some point you do decide to ask her out, try to do it in person. If that isn't an option, definitely email before Instant message. Write a poem for her! Most girls adore getting poems, but make sure YOU write it. I wrote a poem for my first girlfriend the day after I asked her out, and she say that she looked up the exact lyrics on Google just to make sure that I wrote it. Beware my friend! Respond with updates!

[surfhb2]

You know it's to early to call if they answer and it takes them a minute to remember you. I wouldn't call her. I would message her on Facebook, ask if it's okay to use your phone number to text. If she says yes, go ahead and talk for a while, then call. If at some point you do decide to ask her out, try to do it in person. If that isn't an option, definitely email before Instant message. Write a poem for her! Most girls adore getting poems, but make sure YOU write it. I wrote a poem for my first girlfriend the day after I asked her out, and she say that she looked up the exact lyrics on Google just to make sure that I wrote it. Beware my friend! Respond with updates!

Yeah.....write a girl you barely know a poem. That will just make her day

[someguyintexas]

Yeah.....write a girl you barely know a poem. That will just make her day

SurfHB You make my day
Your lines of whit are interesting, i must say
I write you this poem to tell you
I am not gay


Did you adore the poem HB? You can Google it, I wrote it myself...

[BurritoBandito]

Yeah.....write a girl you barely know a poem. That will just make her day

If You Didn't Notice, I Specifically Said To Not Call Her. Ask Her On Facebook If He Can Text Her. Talk For A While, and "If At Some Point You Do Decide To Ask Her Out, Try To Do It In Person." Meaning, When He Knows Her Well Enough To Ask Her Out, Write Her A Poem. Not First Thing. Try To Read More Carefully Next Time Before You Make Snobby Remarks

[surfhb2]

If You Didn't Notice, I Specifically Said To Not Call Her. Ask Her On Facebook If He Can Text Her. Talk For A While, and "If At Some Point You Do Decide To Ask Her Out, Try To Do It In Person." Meaning, When He Knows Her Well Enough To Ask Her Out, Write Her A Poem. Not First Thing. Try To Read More Carefully Next Time Before You Make Snobby Remarks

No....I read it and its still a bad idea. BYE

[BurritoBandito]

No....I read it and its still a bad idea. BYE

That's Fine, I Mean It's Your Opinion. To Be Honest When It All Comes Down To It, People Find Out A Way To Ask The Girl They Like Out With Their Own Ideas. I Was Just Giving A Suggestion. It Has Worked For Me In The Past, So That Is Why I Posted It.

[MMX]

That's Fine, I Mean It's Your Opinion. To Be Honest When It All Comes Down To It, People Find Out A Way To Ask The Girl They Like Out With Their Own Ideas. I Was Just Giving A Suggestion. It Has Worked For Me In The Past, So That Is Why I Posted It.

I was about to message her tonight as I saw her online. As I'm writing this post, she vanished lol. I just need to work out how I'm going to initiate a conversation with her and manage to talk through for a few solid minutes so it doesn't feel awkward. That will make the transition easier to ask her out.

I hear ya.....but this is not a random girl In the OPs situation

She isn't a random but I have barely spoken to the girl. Asking her out from out of the blue might scare her off and sound too direct. I guess the word "player" wasn't really the right word to use lol. More like coming on "too strong".

[Boisdevie]

Asking her out from out of the blue might scare her off and sound too direct. I guess the word "player" wasn't really the right word to use lol. More like coming on "too strong".

Nice excuses there sport. PUSSY.