Just shy or just not into me?

[Peanutbear3]

Need some advice please.

I met a guy just before Xmas. It was through mutual friends, second time meeting him, but I hadn't been interested first time. We hung out the whole night, he was kind of awkward and shy about getting my number, but eventually did and even (albeit awkwardly) went for a kiss - this was after we had had a fair few drinks. So he texted the next day to meet and we met and had food and drinks.

We then met during the week again. He had already told me he was shy. He also said he liked to get to know girls first etc... Anyway, I had had a few drinks and was confused, I couldn't tell if he liked me and it was getting frustrating. So I basically asked him was he interested, he said yes or else he wouldn't be there. I told him how did he expect a girl to know a guy was interested if he didn't touch her/hold her hand/kiss her. He agreed and I guess it was a bit awkward for a while. But, he wanted to stay for more drinks.

Anyway, I decided just to forget about it. He then put his hand lightly on my leg. I was chatting and was getting excited about a topic, really into the conversation, when suddenly, mid-conversation he kissed me, literally lunged mid-word!! It was nice. We stayed until 1am, then it was a but awkward leaving...he was like ' Life goes on after Xmas, and he'd see me then.' He texted to make sure I got home OK.

The next day I was embarrassed that I had been so forward as I am not normally like that, I'm normally the shy, insecure one. So I texted that evening to apologise for any awkwardness. He replied, saying it was probably his fault and that he had enjoyed the night. We texted a little and said we'd meet after he came back from his folks for Xmas. That was 21st December.

I didn't expect to hear from him over Xmas, but was a bit upset when a week later still nothing. So I texted. he replied and we texted a bit, eventually, I was like just do it and asked would he still like to meet again. He said yes and we's arrange something when he was back in the new year.

Anyway, that was a week ago. I don't think he is back yet, but have no way of knowing. He has exams soon and so is studying for them. I don't think I should initiate contact again. But, I am left confused. I thought he liked me. Why text and say he wanted to meet if he didn't, and why be flirty in texts if he was just trying to be nice and let me down gently? Am I fooling myself that he likes me? Should I just forget him and move on?

Advice/opinions appreciated.

[fearoflove]

I would say leave this one alone. He is either:

1) painfully shy which means that you would be stuck being the initiator all the time

or

2) Other stuff are going on that you don't know about (maybe he is attached to another girl, maybe it isn't the right time for him to date, he isn't over an ex, etc)

Either one of those possibilities isn't good so I would say, forget this one.

[surfhb2]

Yeah....let him call you

[AnErin]

He might not be as shy as you think.
Men play games like this so the woman will call him. Maybe he is afraid of seeming needy.
If you like him, just call. What do you have to lose?

Plus from my own experience - time between contacts doesn't always mean much. One of the people I dated, we went like a year with no contact. Yet we still date. I did go through the whole "think I am in love" thing but we came to terms and life is good.

You can have a good dating life with this guy but someone must break the ice.

[caringperson]

I am a little bit shy too, anyway I think I'll go for
1) painfully shy which means that you would be stuck being the initiator all the time. (what fearoflove said)
This is partly true but I think that once you know him and meet him a lot he'll get over this, I was the same.

But my questions are, did you tell him you like him?
If you didn't and he told you he liked you, isn't that confusing for him?

[Peanutbear3]

I asked him if he wanted to meet again (showing my interest), he said yes and that when he was back we would arrange something in the new year.....would he lie just to be nice and hope I wouldn't text again so he wouldn't have to deal with it?

[Silhouettes]

Doubt it. Sounds like the guy is just awkward and shy and has a hard time showing interest. You should arrange something firmly. Set a place and time. If he's busy, but wants to meet up, he'll reschedule.