Lost Dogs In The Breakup

[elmnt07]

Okay so this may be silly to some but for those who are dog lovers can hopefully relate.

My ex bought me two dogs for a couple years ago and we broke up about a month ago and he would not let me have the dogs. I'm more upset about losing them than I am him. They were like my kids and the ones I was with the most.

Well my ex and I have not kept in much contact and it's going okay. I saw the dogs twice since the breakup and it kills me to leave them and makes things worse so as hard as it has been, I think it's best I don't see them, or my ex for that matter. My ex says I can see the dogs whenever I want and I can take them to my parents (whom I had to move back in with on the weekends or whatever I want to do. He also has to go out of town for work for a week and asked if I could come let the dogs out etc. I told him I wasn't sure and I feel its messed up he would even ask me. We'll anyway, when I say I don't know or I don't think its a good idea etc about seeing the dogs he says I don't love them or I don't care about them and is never loved them. Stuff like that.

So my question is, am I wrong for saying no? Does it make me look like I don't love them or care about them? I know I do and part of me thinks I know the truth but the other part lets him get to me and makes me feel guilty because I was the one who left.

[basilandthyme]

Refusing to help care for them does make it look like you don't love them. If you truly want to spend time with them, this would be a perfect opportunity to take them to live with you for a bit.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

It doesn't make it look like you don't love them. You wanted to keep them. Tell him if he wants to leave the dogs with you permanently then you are open to it, otherwise he should stop contacting you altogether. Tell your ex he's acting like a bitch.

[elmnt07]

I did care for them. I paid for all their vet bills and food for 2 years and played with them, trained them and took them for walks etc. like I mentioned, they were like my kids and I was with them more than I was with anyone else.

[elmnt07]

He won't let me have them, I've begged.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

He won't let me have them, I've begged.

Then tell him to **** off and never talk to you again. You should also say things like you never loved him, and you dumped him because he couldn't satisfy you.

Were the dogs a gift to you? If they were, and you've paid all of the maintenance on them, you could very well have a claim to the dogs in court.

[surfhb2]

This guy is a true Piece of shit. Are there laws about just up and taking them? If not, id come the middle of the night and never see this D bag again.

[basilandthyme]

Hang on, I missed the bit about how the dogs were a gift to you. I realise he didn't give you permission to take them, but why didn't you take them anyway? You don't need his permission to take what is yours.

[surfhb2]

If I were you Id just take them and never show your face again.....your puppies will love you the rest of their lives

[elmnt07]

He bought me Bella for Christmas one yr and then the next he got Duke and said that the dogs "stayed with the house" we lived together and when I left I had to move back in with my parents. When I was moving my things he took the dogs to his mothers house so I couldn't say bye and eventually came back to let me say bye. I threatened him with court but he said it's the last thing I'd ever take from him. I really thought about it but I know he'd fight like hell just as well as me and I read that since he purchased them the court will side with him even though I did pay for vet bills and food for the past 2 yrs. I love those dogs but it kills me to leave them again and every time I see them as well as him it makes it harder for me and that's why I don't think its a good idea. Part of me thinks I'll be ok and I really miss them and want to see them but I've seen them since we broke up And it kills me all over again. Another part of me feels guilty for leaving especially when he says things like I don't love them or care for them :/

[HeartIsAching]

Can they stay with you at your parents' house? If so, I'd take him up on his offer, then not give them back.

[elmnt07]

No, my parents already have two dogs and said it would be too much. :/

[seecrithiding]

Unfortunately I don't really have any advice for you hun, but I just wanted to say that I'm wicked sorry for what you're going through because I know y-would be devastated if I lost my puppy-face.