We haven't seen each other in a year. Do I send.

[unknwn]

I watched a video today from my Facebook home feed. At the end of the video it said Tell someone how you feel. You wont regret it.

I dont know what happened. We use to go on walks, walks full of laughter.. In Brock. Laurier. Waterfalls. It was crazy fun, I legit felt on top of the World like a King. I saw so much greatness and value in you, I made the decision to myself shes the one, Im putting all effort into it. I want everything to be memorable so we when were wrinkly we can remember together.

At this point I said fcuk it, she doesn't care, and I went back to killing time on Facebook during the downtime at the office. I continued on scrolling and liking on my home news feed.



I came across Mila Kunis s status update. A picture, but the caption - Never give up on the things you really want in life.

I came back here, and I'm thoughts to words again. Our last meeting before the break up, in the silver c class. We drove and parked beside a car rental place, the parking lot next over behind a retail building. We took it to the back seat. we were about to and I said no. So infused in the moment but I held off. Our first has to be special. not back here, classier. In the next few days while I was at work, we were texting. I asked the girl that called me Beybo to give me a quick kiss over the phone. You wouldn't reply. A phone call of tears followed... I was so confused as to what happened. What did i do? Ok. Maybe someone else said or did something to her and shes calling me. Time to listen. You wouldn't tell me. I kept saying I'm here for you, you can tell me anything. talk to me. The conversation ended with i need some time and denied call backs.



I to this day don't know what happened. But something still kept telling me to keep you in my life. I see so much value in you, I tried to the extent of it changing me. Focusing so much on trying to get close to you again, experimenting different ways. In the end I always mucked up. I even went to the extent of lying to you about other girls. Now even if i tell you the truth it would be hard for you to believe me , i can understand. Either that or you don't care. Montreal came along, the accident, all i cared about was us having a good time for my cousin's birthday so i spent money irresponsibly. That whole trip.... i can go on about but whats the point.



Me... To this day i feel the same way about you after it all. You are the most amazingly beautiful girl inside and out, intelligent, fun childish yet mature. I wish i could say this to you in person or on the phone, but i don't know for sure if you want that. Today we may be different people than when we first met, but i will still think of you as that girl. Don't think of me as an ex who never got over you, rather one that values who you are, Is happy for you in all your accomplishments, is not a sad person, and thanks you for playing a lead role from behind the scenes in molding myself to who I am thus far. How i feel... I would still choose you over every other girl I've met thus far. It sounds dumb, its blind, its the truth. Realistically, its not so simple to jump back in.. I still want to grind through. I made mistakes, i was heavy at the time and feel i was bringing you down with me. I'm sorry for that. Getting to the point. You are amazing, and even if you don't want anything to do with me you deserve to be told that. If not by me, whoever you chose. I hope I get another chance someday.