My girlfriend is suddenly having doubts and being influenced by her friends? Help!

[jumpingthegun]

Evening everyone!
Completely new to any of this kind of stuff but just needed somewhere to go and get some female opinions, really appreciated!
I'll try not to keep this to long and bore you all so I'll keep to the basics,
Me and my girlfriend have been friends for just over 5 years, best friends, male female, and everybody used to laugh and say we would end up together but we both didn't think it would happen, but it has and its been great.
So 12 months down the line and everything has been pretty great, no issues with any of the normal relationship stuff, we both worked really hard at crossing the friend zone line but it all took its place naturally and we've been made up.
There's been an awful lot of stress more recently, the end of last year and start of the new year and we've both let things get to us, our families stressed situations, doing things for our families, work, the weather and time of year! tiredness and a lot of pressure generally for two young people. Including me having to undergo temporary hospital treatment last year, one of our cats recently died in my family, another knocked over, and although that doesn't sound a problem obviously all of these things take an emotional effect, my girlfriend works and I'm currently out of work, applying front right and centre for a job so we can progress together as we cant do it on one wage. My girlfriend works long hours and a distance to and from work everyday and is always tired.
I've also had some other pressures, low self esteem, being declined for jobs, financial stress, never having money to take us anywhere or do anything, my health, still living at home even though that's average and not a big issue... and overcoming ways I've been treated by girls in the past, cheated on and had my trust dragged through the ground. Now, the advantage to this relationship is that the trust had already been built and we know each other inside out.
Things have been going great like I say, until recently, the last couple of weeks (only couple!) everything has taken its toll on us both, her long days and demanding situations that arise in her life and my small insecurities and seasonal depression as my doctor called it, after work the other day she decided to meet a female friend for a catch up and coffee, all average stuff, as soon as she arrived home and text me to let me know she was home, everything had changed, all of a sudden she has decided the relationship is unhealthy because I am sometimes controlling, and insecure, but more so recently.
So I'm completely taken back at this point as I've been so worried about different things recently I've let it all build and almost brought it out as a problem with my girlfriend which the chances are, it hasn't been, because I know I love her and trust her. So now she's decided her heads all over the place, she's low and the relationship has recently made her unhappy, we met to talk it through and I'd obviously had the wake up call I needed to realise my mistakes and it was going fine until she then popped out she was having doubts spinning in her head about us even getting together in the first place and weather we should have remained friends?! So we've not broken up, she's asked for space so she can see if she misses me or not, and I'm trying my hardest to do that. I haven't called or text her and I've let her make the first move, so she has, obviously the texts have changed slightly, less kisses by a few and a little sharper but not any actual signs of where its going or whets happening, its been about 24/48 hours since we had a 45 min chat about things, what do I do? Let her have more time and just reply when she writes or do I push for some direction on what's happening? any other questions/comments please let me know, and thanks in advance, pulling my hair out without her around and what to do whatever I can to bring her back onto my side.

[HeartIsAching]

Ugh. Break that up into paragraphs and I'll read it.

[jumpingthegun]

Evening everyone! Completely new to any of this kind of stuff but just needed somewhere to go and get some female opinions, really appreciated!

I'll try not to keep this to long and bore you all so I'll keep to the basics, me and my girlfriend have been friends for just over 5 years, best friends, male female, and everybody used to laugh and say we would end up together but we both didn't think it would happen, but it has and its been great. So 12 months down the line and everything has been pretty great, no issues with any of the normal relationship stuff, we both worked really hard at crossing the friend zone line but it all took its place naturally and we've been made up.

There's been an awful lot of stress more recently, the end of last year and start of the new year and we've both let things get to us, our families stressed situations, doing things for our families, work, the weather and time of year! tiredness and a lot of pressure generally for two young people. Including me having to undergo temporary hospital treatment last year, one of our cats recently died in my family, another knocked over, and although that doesn't sound a problem obviously all of these things take an emotional effect, my girlfriend works and I'm currently out of work, applying front right and centre for a job so we can progress together as we cant do it on one wage. My girlfriend works long hours and a distance to and from work everyday and is always tired.

I've also had some other pressures, low self esteem, being declined for jobs, financial stress, never having money to take us anywhere or do anything, my health, still living at home even though that's average and not a big issue... and overcoming ways I've been treated by girls in the past, cheated on and had my trust dragged through the ground. Now, the advantage to this relationship is that the trust had already been built and we know each other inside out.

Things have been going great like I say, until recently, the last couple of weeks (only couple!) everything has taken its toll on us both, her long days and demanding situations that arise in her life and my small insecurities and seasonal depression as my doctor called it, after work the other day she decided to meet a female friend for a catch up and coffee, all average stuff, as soon as she arrived home and text me to let me know she was home, everything had changed, all of a sudden she has decided the relationship is unhealthy because I am sometimes controlling, and insecure, but more so recently.

So I'm completely taken back at this point as I've been so worried about different things recently I've let it all build and almost brought it out as a problem with my girlfriend which the chances are, it hasn't been, because I know I love her and trust her. So now she's decided her heads all over the place, she's low and the relationship has recently made her unhappy, we met to talk it through and I'd obviously had the wake up call I needed to realise my mistakes and it was going fine until she then popped out she was having doubts spinning in her head about us even getting together in the first place and weather we should have remained friends?! So we've not broken up, she's asked for space so she can see if she misses me or not, and I'm trying my hardest to do that. I haven't called or text her and I've let her make the first move, so she has, obviously the texts have changed slightly, less kisses by a few and a little sharper but not any actual signs of where its going or whets happening, its been about 24/48 hours since we had a 45 min chat about things.

What do I do? Let her have more time and just reply when she writes or do I push for some direction on what's happening? any other questions/comments please let me know, and thanks in advance, pulling my hair out without her around and what to do whatever I can to bring her back onto my side.

[basilandthyme]

Mate, I've gotta be honest and say that this relationship doesn't sound like a whole lotta fun. It doesn't surprise me that she's strongly reconsidering.

For what it's worth, girls don't generally persuade their friends to leave a relationship unless that girls is unhappy with the relationship. I'd lay money that your girlfriend has told her friends that she's unhappy and considering leaving...and they are simply supporting her decision.

It's time to get your own baggage sorted out. If she doesn't come back, then at least you'll be in a better place for future relationships.

[jumpingthegun]

Well I've realised that now, maybe a bit too late. Thanks anyway.