Being Dominant for a male

[gonzo887]

My girlfriend says she feels like the man in the relationship most of the time. It is because every time I choose somewhere to eat she says no and we do what she wants because she is picky. I go to her place every night because her roommates are fun and my roommate is annoying plus its closer to both our offices. That part doesn't have anything to do with this except that it is on her time when I come over like when she is ready and tells me to. Its the little stuff like that that I try to take lead and she doesn't let it happen. She tells me to take lead but how can I?

She also says I need to be more dominant in bed, I try to take lead but she always wants to stay in missionary because it feels good and she finishes rather quickly. Getting her off isn't the problem its doing positions I want to do.

[searock]

Maybe she just wants you to tell her "no, we're doing what I want now", every once in a while? Or maybe she doesn't really know what she wants. How old are the two of you?

[surfhb2]

Forget what she wants.....tell her YOU what you want and do it!

[gonzo887]

I am 24 she is 23 about to turn 24. I guess I just feel like I don't want to piss her off and her just say ok we are done. She gets mad easily and she has been extremely stressed out lately with finding a new job and a few other small things but that's about it.

[searock]

So... I don't think she knows what she wants. Probably, if you did start to be more assertive and not give in to every one of her requests, she wouldn't like that either. Are you sure she is the best match for you? Has she always been like this or is it just a period she's going through? Don't you feel like you're walking on eggshells all the time, with her?

[gonzo887]

She is just stressed out like no other. We have only been dating since November. I do like her a lot and when its good its real good but when its bad, like her in a bad mood, its like omg why. I am just thinking once this job stressing passes it will be a lot better. When we first met it was good for a while then the job thing and a few other things hit. Then when shes mad she always brings up all what I talked about earlier, then apologizes later on. I just need tips to be more dominant I guess and if it works out for the better then hell yea if not then I cant keep being her punching bag and her walk all over me.

[basilandthyme]

Forget about restaruants..... A much more important way to start being more dominant would be to refuse to be her punching bag. If you stay around and cop her foul moods, then she's absolutely right that you're lacking in balls.

Next time she turns her temper on, don't try and calm her. And don't yell back at her. Simply tell her that her behaviour is unacceptable and walk out. And don't return until she apologises. Do this every time she's acting appallingly.

Word of warning though, yes it may well ease when her job stresses end. But unless she addresses her own issues, her temper will return when she next gets stressed out. This ISN'T a one time blip in her personality.

[gonzo887]

Excellent feed back everyone, thanks I will keep you updated on how it all goes in the weeks to come if yall are interested.

[michelle23]

Youve been together 4 months and shes proving hard to please, sulky, easily stressed, angry, whiny and trying to change you. I think you need to put your foot down and tell her you wont be treated that way

[pcmaster]

This will be rather useful for you. Read the text man

loveforum.net/threads/85672-Guide-How-to-deal-with-breakup

Also I have feeling that she dont respect you. She reminds that girl who woke up in the moorning and first think she do is puch her BF in face just because she wanted. Or the girl who complains about lack of sex but when her BF touches her she starts to panic. These are real girls I have met.
I think it could be your looks or the way you act, your confidence, personality why she dont respects you. Some girls needs man who can put them in their place and from that comes out long relationship and girl respects the guy. Your girl dont makes logic - shes just emotional. Also you have to stop fearing of making negative impact. Even stop fear of losing her. This will give you caurage to make some impact and gain some respect in relationship.

This could give you some more hint.

[gonzo887]

Hell yea I will take that into mind and that does help out a lot. I am not taking her shit anymore and if she doesnt like that then I am out.

[galaxyman]

Seems like the "nice-guy" syndrome I've struggled with my whole life. I've tried "putting my foot down" nicely, without being a dick, and it's worked very well over the last year. I've found women love it when a guy has a backbone and isn't upset to stand up for what he actually wants.