How to respond to email from EX after 4 months of no contact?

[LadyRadiator2.0]

I broke up with my ex about four months ago before the holidays. Since then, we have had no contact whatsoever and I blocked him on Facebook. We had dated for about a year and I decided to end the relationship because he was still in love with his ex, whom he has a five year old daughter with. While we were together, we had his relationship status on Facebook as "single" and he would post things on Facebook about still being in love with his ex (which he would deny or try to justify with excuses whenever I would confront him about it). Right before I broke up with him, he admitted to me that he was going over to his exe's house almost every evening and having dinner with her and her kids (she has four other children from other men). I was tired of his foolish games and even though I had developed some feelings for him, I decided to cut all contact. Two days ago, he sent me this email:

Hey,

It has been quite a while and I hope all is well with you.

You do not have to read this message nor do you have to reply.

I’m apologize for the way I made you feel towards the end. There is no excuse and I feel we were both focusing on the negative a little too much.
I wanted you to know I took your advice long ago. I stopped hanging out with the other kids and hanging around my Xs house.

I have been shopping for a house for the past few months instead of a place to rent. I am waiting on some information so I can proceed with my preapproval. If that falls through I have a couple places I may rent. (this is referring to the plans that he has to move out of his parent's house. He is 35 years old and stil living at home)

Life for me has continuously been crazy and seemingly more stressful. I seem to have difficulty coping with my stress and I think it is building up.

I don’t know if you care to know or not, I don’t want to bring back any bad memories. I do think about you still, maybe if things were not so crazy in our lives maybe they would have worked out differently. I feel the stress in our lives was consuming us in a bad way.
Truthfully I would like to see you and have some lunch or dinner someday if you are available. No date, just hanging out like friends. If you are not up to it, no worries.

I hope happiness has found you and I wish you well.

Sincerely,
TJ


I am not sure how to respond to this or even if I should. He wants to have lunch or dinner with me "to hang out like friends" lol....

[KellyH]

In my opinion, this guy treated you like crap when you were dating. Its one thing to not put it on fb (because some people are weird about that) but to openly talk about still loving his ex is wrong. Not to mention the fact that he lied to you and was hanging out with her behind your back.

I think he may be lonely. He's just ended with his ex, or maybe she ended it with him, either way I think he's looking for someone to fall back on and since you loved him through all his crap he thinks you could be that person. Do you want to be that person?

Before you hang out with him or reply to his message I think you should ask yourself what YOU want. Do you want to give this guy another chance after everything he did last time? Do you still love him? Should you still love him? And do you think he's really changed?

Hope this helps!

[Boisdevie]

Why bother to reply. The guy treated you like a piece of shit. Why waste even one second thinking about this guy. Let him get stuffed.

[crazyone1]

Don't go back his ex probably kicked him out of her life and he wants you back because you have a history with him. and i agree with the previous reply he treated you like crap you are batter than that just remember if he loved you in the beginning this wouldn't be the situation he is i.

[Wakeup]

Life for me has continuously been crazy and seemingly more stressful. I seem to have difficulty coping with my stress and I think it is building up.

He's still not in a good place. He's still going to make one lousy LIFEpartner so why would you even consider having him in your life in ANY capacity. You cannot be "just friends" with someone you've had emotionally and you broke up with, but still loved when you did. Its next to impossible for you to do that and he's not a good partner to fall in love with all over again.

Just don't reply. It will only open up one huge can of emotional worms for YOU.

There are other men in the world that don't have ex issues. Men who have standards that wouldn't want someone who has four children with different men who are no longer around. That is one flaming red flag about her and her inability to maintain relationships but he still stayed with her anyway until he too joined the ranks of her EX.. Don't be like him.

Good for you for leaving him. Now don't go back for more emotional turmoil from this issued man. Block and delete him so you're not tempted to respond to that manipulative spew.

[Potion9]

Why go back to someone who treated you like crap?
Stay clear, No contact. Unless you enjoyed the way he treated you before.....