issues feeling terrible :(

[Louis25]

So ive met up with a woman a week ago. I was so nervous i did not do a thing. And she was dissapointed with me when i got back home... Now we talked about it a lot today and i feel completetly torn up...with her saying to not be so negative...I screwed up forgetting taking money with me and did not take a move...we did have intimicy (spell sry) but after that i was so insecure i did not take a move it was a nightmare for both of us and i regret being shy not making a move so much now...it ruined everything she'd expect from us having a romantic weekend..and nothing happened

Now i did talk to her today...and she said we should take it slow and be friends is the most important thing right now...my heart is broken...and i need to prevent myself from asking her stuff...until she just sighed and said stop being so negative about things...

We still talk and stuff but not that often anymore...she suggested taking it slow..we could still carry on where we were...with us being happy..she said...what does that mean?

I suggested we should re meet in a couple months so i can get my stuff sorted out and take her out and show her my love for he, she said yes nothing more.

Now is this still worth a try or any hope left at all...if i could meet again ( this is another country btw ) id make her feel so loved and different...yet again im afraid of losing her in this peroid also She hasnt been in a relationship for years but im still wondering should i still love her and try my best to be there for her...i'm afraid in the months i do prepare she will lose interest in me...she loved me for being so nice and helpfull at stressing times...i can still do that right and fix it? or this lost beyond repair already...

this woman obviously loved or still loves me but wont show it?

my shyness ruined it all but is it fixable if next time ill take the lead and do it differently?


i was also sickish by the nerves and it dissapointed her...i still want to re try it..but im feeling im actually trying too hard now..im afraid of ending up alone once again and it hurts...im a lonely person so i think finally having some love made me shine...we had a discussion about it half a day and it wore me out...i feel like i was nothing but someone to bring over to see if i made her tick..and if i didnt not big deal either...well not for her anyway she says..but for me...it is...and i still want to figure it out..after a huge discussion she went to bed and im left behind wondering once again...altho my shyness ruined it then again if i was too afraid to do things with her..im not anymore...i think we shall see how it goes and perhaps re meet...altho somehow it could be an absolute stupid idea and i end up being a puppy with feelings for her...

i am 32 shes 40 with a child from another country...i wonder why i still see through all this and am still in love with her...maybe its because im lonely and i finally got approached somehow whom gave me love...but now i lost it all again and it feels dreadfull...if only i could just get over it..and see what happens through time to make it work perhaps...

i feel like im so messed up im rambling stuff.. am i being used just for an evaluation or something? i cant even tell.

[bekho]

Be a man

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[Potion9]

What a stupid reply
"Be a man"



Give her time to think. Do no put pressure on her about trying it again etc.
If she has feelings and cares for you this is a very minor hiccup in the relationship imo.
This is just another way that "nice guys finish last". Sure you were shy but she could of made a move as well to reduce your nerves and shyness.
I would avoid talking about the negatives, and talk about the positives of the trip. Did you have fun? Did you laugh together? Did you connect? Were you closer then just a "buddy" or "pal" during the trip??
You have known her for a week or 2. So honestly it isn't that big of deal if she moves on, or if she decides to keep talking with her and opens the door to future opportunities etc.

[michelle23]

Did you say she lives in another country?? Uh! Love is hard enough without throwing crazy complicated shit like that in the mix.. RME

[Louis25]

Thank you for the replies guys , yes i agree potion that is a very good point you made, thank you.

[dani5566]

you gotta work on your self confidence !!!!!!!!
treat the problem not the issue