Found out recently my ex (long term) gf (5months ago broke up) cheated on me

[GrayFox]

A while ago I posted a thread about my relationship ending, and I wanted advice from you all. A couple days ago, I found out that she was cheating on me with a another guy (who I in fact know and disliked even before this new info), who she is now seeing. I don't know if they were sleeping together, but I a common friend let me know that they were hooking up and going on dates before our relationship ended. The issue is that one of common friends is throwing a huge party and she is bringing the guy she cheated on me with as a date. My real concern is that: he is the kind of guy who would seek me out at the party and try to talk to me about how he's seeing her now in a gloatingand aggravating kind of way.

I don't know how to feel really, I still have some feelings for her... but for the most part I've moved on and don't want to be with her (it's been 5months and I just met someone new about a month ago) It's just finding out she did in fact cheat on me still hurts for some reason, even though it's been 5 months since we broke up.
Having the relationship end in the terrible way it did was really tough, but finding out she cheated on me (with someone I disliked even before) makes it much worse. I thought I had moved on and that I didn't care, but the truth is that it makes me feel so in antiquate in how I am...

I just want some advice about what I should do about the party, and what I should in general?

[michelle23]

How you are feeling is normal. 5months isn't that long and its always a kick in the stomach to find out you have been betrayed.

I wouldnt go to the party if you think there could be agravation over her. Dont give her the satisfaction of showing you are still upset and defo dont get into an argument with him. She would love that and you would be playing right into her hands. If you do go-ignore her and act like you dont care

[smackie9]

I wouldn't go to the party.

[GrayFox]

I don't want to go to the party that much, but I want to go to simply not be afraid of being in the same room as her. For a while I stopped going to the same parties as her as well as not hang out with friends cuz I knew she would be there; I just don't want her to be the reason I make myself miss so many opportunities. We share some common classes, so we sometimes see each other passing by; she knows she hurt me and she always has this face of guilt and shame when she sees me and I feel pathetic and self-conscious around her, the point being that I just want to be able to pass by her and see her as just a stranger, not someone I loved and trusted.
I also ask just in case, if I end up bumping into her and she tries to talk to me should I talk to her(I mean if she doesn't act bitchy, and is trying to make small talk) Or just quickly (and politely) end the conversation?
Would it be better for me if I just avoid her at all cost?

- - - Updated - - -

Oh, and a girl I have a thing with (we flirted a couple times and are interested in each other but nothing has come of it yet) will be at the party. It's not wrong in anyway if I try to hook up with her there? Even though my ex is there with the guy she cheated on me with -- like would it be better if I try to hold my advances toward her until we are in an ex-cheating-gf free zone?

[michelle23]

I broke up with my ex coz he cheated. 6months later I was at a party and he was there with his new gf. It really didnt bother me. I went outside to have a fag and he came out, tried to make small talk-I was polite and then went back inside. A few minutes later his gf was crying outside sitting on the wall. I didnt ask why-just had a few shots, sang happy bday to mg friend with a cake and candles and they we left to go to a nightclub..

Shes not your problem, you dont have to be nice to her and its none of her business if you start seeing someone else. When I met my current bf, we went out another night. My ex and his gf were there. Someone started spreding rumours that my bf was going to attack my ex-I was like wtf haha. People are stupid. My bf didnt even no my ex was there or what he looked like.

[Wakeup]

I don't want to go to the party that much, but I want to go to simply not be afraid of being in the same room as her. For a while I stopped going to the same parties as her as well as not hang out with friends cuz I knew she would be there; I just don't want her to be the reason I make myself miss so many opportunities. We share some common classes, so we sometimes see each other passing by; she knows she hurt me and she always has this face of guilt and shame when she sees me and I feel pathetic and self-conscious around her, the point being that I just want to be able to pass by her and see her as just a stranger, not someone I loved and trusted.
I also ask just in case, if I end up bumping into her and she tries to talk to me should I talk to her(I mean if she doesn't act bitchy, and is trying to make small talk) Or just quickly (and politely) end the conversation?
Would it be better for me if I just avoid her at all cost?

- - - Updated - - -

Oh, and a girl I have a thing with (we flirted a couple times and are interested in each other but nothing has come of it yet) will be at the party. It's not wrong in anyway if I try to hook up with her there? Even though my ex is there with the guy she cheated on me with -- like would it be better if I try to hold my advances toward her until we are in an ex-cheating-gf free zone?

Take the new girl to the party ~ Ask her to go with you, don't just hook up with her while you are there. Make it known that you came as a couple.

As for the ex and her new future ex boyfriend. Ignore her, ignore him and if he gets in your face, tell your mutual friends to have your back and just distract him from being an ass and possibly causing grief to the party.

Your situation is not unique. It happens all the time and if you're going to maintain Mutual friends then you're going to have to get used to seeing them together. Hitch up your jeans and get over the awkwardness. This can be achieved by becoming used to seeing them together which will eventually get you to the stage of indifference to them and what ever they happen to be up to.

Walk tall.

[Marcky]

The same thing happened to me before. Its was painful to see someone you have feelings with together with another random guy.

Go to the party and shake the guy's hand. Be generous and get over her. Start anew with that new girl of yours.

Be brave and you will conquer all.