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Thread: should i tell my new boyfriend about my family nudism or hide it?

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    should i tell my new boyfriend about my family nudism or hide it?

    i live really close to a nude beach and my mum and stepdad are nudists and me too.

    i asked my new bf what he thought of nudism and he said he thinks its disgusting for a family to live nude together.

    so should i tell him the truth about my family or just not say it?

    would you break up with a girl because of that kind of thing?

    thankyou

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    This should not about whether or not he'd break up with you. Rather, it's about how important your lifestyle is to you and if you're OK with someone who will you judge you for what you have done in the past/continue to do.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    Quote Originally Posted by basilandthyme View Post
    This should not about whether or not he'd break up with you. Rather, it's about how important your lifestyle is to you and if you're OK with someone who will you judge you for what you have done in the past/continue to do.
    oh i see. interesting. i guess i'm ok if he judges me cos my best friends think nudism is strange :o

    this is tricky :[

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    See, dating is not about conforming to be what someone else approves of - it's about finding someone who loves you for who you are. That's not to say that none of us need a bit of tweaking now and then, but our adjustments should be for us - not for someone else.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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    Quote Originally Posted by basilandthyme View Post
    See, dating is not about conforming to be what someone else approves of - it's about finding someone who loves you for who you are. That's not to say that none of us need a bit of tweaking now and then, but our adjustments should be for us - not for someone else.
    wish i knew another nudist my age. all the nudists i know are elders except for my step-bro!

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    He says that cause he dont know much about it. Nudism is about being okay with naked bodies is it? Invite him over some day and let him see that its all natural. Encourage him to be nude too.

    I personaly prefer clothes cause its warmer with them on since I live in Nordic country. But I been in Greece where its okay to be naked in beach so its all cool with me.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    Quote Originally Posted by pollydancer View Post
    i live really close to a nude beach and my mum and stepdad are nudists and me too.

    i asked my new bf what he thought of nudism and he said he thinks its disgusting for a family to live nude together.

    so should i tell him the truth about my family or just not say it?

    would you break up with a girl because of that kind of thing?

    thankyou
    Disgusting? What's disgusting about the human body? Screw him, I'd break up with HIM for that shit.

    Frankly, my wife and I are both nudists... clothes are always optional at our house.

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    You only do it on the beach or nudist colony or in your home not at your job or out in regular social areas so it would only affect him if he visits your home.
    I'd want to know something like that, because it isn't the norm and he has already expressed to you he finds it disgusting in general so give him the chance to decide with the truth not ambush him with the truth if he goes to your home ever.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pcmaster View Post
    He says that cause he dont know much about it. Nudism is about being okay with naked bodies is it? Invite him over some day and let him see that its all natural. Encourage him to be nude too.

    I personaly prefer clothes cause its warmer with them on since I live in Nordic country. But I been in Greece where its okay to be naked in beach so its all cool with me.
    the strange thing is he takes my clothes off when we are alone, so maybe he could be ok eventually about nudism!

    Quote Originally Posted by HeartIsAching View Post
    Disgusting? What's disgusting about the human body? Screw him, I'd break up with HIM for that shit.

    Frankly, my wife and I are both nudists... clothes are always optional at our house.
    me too clothes are option, i only just began it at home 3 years ago because my mum did, and we moved in with her new husband and he is nudist and his son. but even before that we lived close to the nude beach at mount eliza all my life so i had been nude at the beach all my life.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by somehelp4me View Post
    You only do it on the beach or nudist colony or in your home not at your job or out in regular social areas so it would only affect him if he visits your home.
    I'd want to know something like that, because it isn't the norm and he has already expressed to you he finds it disgusting in general so give him the chance to decide with the truth not ambush him with the truth if he goes to your home ever.
    yup i'm not sure how to say it to him.
    he was so clear that he thinks nudisms wrong.
    but he has let me nude in his bedroom but it was for intimacy.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pollydancer View Post
    wish i knew another nudist my age. all the nudists i know are elders except for my step-bro!
    Thanks for that visual ... NOT!
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    Thanks for that visual ... NOT!
    not sure what it means

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    The problem here is that he equates nudity with sex. He's alright with taking your clothes off because he wants to have sex with you. He's not alright with people in non-sexual relationships to be nude around each other because he thinks it means they want to have sex with each other... even if he denies it consciously, he believes it sub-consciously.

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    I think that before you speak with your boyfriend, you should discuss this with your mother. If she encouraged you towards a nudist lifestyle, she should know that you're struggling a bit with your boyfriend and hopefully she has been able to foresee this as a consequence of her decision and she'll have a good advice and support for you.
    Last edited by Valixy; 05-05-14 at 02:10 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HeartIsAching View Post
    The problem here is that he equates nudity with sex. He's alright with taking your clothes off because he wants to have sex with you. He's not alright with people in non-sexual relationships to be nude around each other because he thinks it means they want to have sex with each other... even if he denies it consciously, he believes it sub-consciously.
    it seems that way. even if we are clothed he handles under my skirt - not that i complain, just saying. might be impossible for him to understand the female body with thinking of touching it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Valixy View Post
    I think that before you speak with your boyfriend, you should discuss this with your mother. If she encouraged you towards a nudist lifestyle, she should know that you're struggling a bit with your boyfriend and hopefully she has been able to foresee this as a consequence of her decision and she'll have a good advice and support for you.
    i asked her today and she said not to invite my bf into our lives if he sees the nude body as a sexual object.
    that seems wrong though because my step brother sees our bodies as sexual and mum excuses him.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pollydancer View Post
    i live really close to a nude beach and my mum and stepdad are nudists and me too.

    i asked my new bf what he thought of nudism and he said he thinks its disgusting for a family to live nude together.

    so should i tell him the truth about my family or just not say it?

    would you break up with a girl because of that kind of thing?

    thankyou
    You should tell him, I believe you should be able to share your thoughts and feelings with your other half with total confidence. However, if he takes it very negatively, then you'll have to choose to give up nudism or your BF.


    Quote Originally Posted by pollydancer View Post
    wish i knew another nudist my age. all the nudists i know are elders except for my step-bro!
    Personally, I'm not a nudist though I love being nude at my house with my GF (though I obviously sexually desire her). I don't think I'd feel comfortable being nude with people I know (friends, family... specially my GF's family) but I *think* I could get used to it. I wouldn't have any issues going to a nude beach though, I don't know, I guess it's easier with strangers.
    Last edited by Kokombos; 07-05-14 at 05:26 PM.

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