Did I mess up too bad with my ex?

[adobag]

Well here's the deal,me and this girl had dated just shy of two years. She was definitely my first true love. Around November I broke things off because I felt a little too tied down in the relationship and thought I'd have more fun being single again. I had gone out a little bit and really wasn't feeling it like i thought I would. Out of nowhere about a month later, I started going on dates with some girl that I work with ( who was basically a rebound). Looking back I really had no idea what I was thinking and kick myself in the behind for the decision; but I think a lot of it was me not wanting to swallow my pride and admit I had made the wrong decision. My ex had contacted me a couple of times wanting to talk to me, but I had told her i was enjoying the space right now, even though I still had deep strong feelings for her. This made her flip her lid and basically lead to her going after a couple of rebounds. Right before Valentine's day , the girl I worked with left me for her ex-boyfriend. This wasn't too upsetting for me, but it was a huge wake up call to how much I loved and missed my ex. So in short I've been begging her to get back with me from February until now, doing everything in my power like writing notes and sending flowers; admitting how bad i screwed up and spilling out my feelings. We had made contact every here and there through text; some casual conversation and some arguing. It got to the point where she begged me to leave her alone and that I'll never have another chance and that too much has happened between the break up for her to want to get back together with me and that I "ruined it" for her.
A week went by and we had one last conversation and she mentioned she wants to be friends one day but right now its too hard for her; and that we would be able to see past everything that has happened one day. She also said she cared about me and if I ever needed anything to let her know(or is this just a nice way of telling me its all done with?) It kills me to constantly hear shes having more rebounds and talking to other guys but I love her to the point where I want to wait for her. I know she's starting a new job or already has started; would this play a factor as well? From Feb until now the longest I had gone with NC rule was about 2 weeks but now I'm determined to go longer. It's been two weeks as of today. I mean did I honestly mess up that bad to where it's done forever? Or does true love never die and find its way back? I just keep telling myself there's something to hold on to and there's no way she moved on that fast but I just don't know anymore.

[basilandthyme]

If she was going to come back to you, she would have changed her mind by now. Six months if more than sufficient for her to move on and it would appear that she's done exactly that. I'm not sure why you say she's having 'rebounds' - this is her just dating and having fun with different guys. She's a single woman, so why wouldn't she have a bit of fun?

You're talking about it being true love, but people generally don't go around dumping their true loves. No doubt you're having serious regrets, but if you were really and truly satisfied with her, you never would have left her. Not to mention, if you weren't 100% content with her, then she probably wasn't so content with you either.....which is probably part of the reason she's not interested in returning.