Slept with someone else and pregnant with their child...

[idreamofhappy]

Hello! Forgive me if this is the wrong forum to be posting this in, or if it doesn't fit the guidelines, I'm new!

Anyways, so, I love my boyfriend (of 6 years), but we've been having problems for a while. Mainly financial. We got in a big argument about a week ago, and I felt so upset and hurt by the things he said to me. So I slept with my best friend whom I met online. We'd been talking about meeting up for a while, not to have sex, just to hang out. But after this happened I was desperate to feel happy (it only made me feel worse) so we had sex. I bought a pregnancy test and I told my boyfriend, (also told him that it wasn't his) and he said it would take time to trust me again, but that he would forgive me. The other guy (he didn't know i was with someone else) told me to follow my heart and do what I felt was right, and that he would be upset if I didn't pick him, but he supported whatever I did. So I chose my boyfriend. Even still, I can't help but be overwhelmed with guilt that I deeply hurt two people I care so much about. I really hate myself for this, and I can't even look my partner in the eye anymore. He never brings it up, still tells me he loves me, calls me beautiful, that he'll treat the child as his own, but I KNOW deep down inside he's hurting, and that kills me. What can I do to feel better? How can I make it up to him? I really truly regret what I've done. I don't even know how I'm going to be able to deal with this child, that will only ever bring negative memories to the surface. Does anyone else have a similar experience they can share and how they coped with it?

[TablesandChairs]

Honestly...I would terminate the pregnancy if I was you. But I'm pro-choice and pro doing what seems logical...I know it's not an option for everyone.

But I can't imagine your partner of 6 years truly being okay with this...I mean, after so long together, I'm sure the child he wants to be raising is his, not the child of some online guy's. It's possible you'll get dumped eventually and be a single mum. Messy situation.

[anya_may21]

You should go to a therapist and talk about the guilt you feel, it can't be helping your health and the new baby feeling how you do.

If both men were good about this difficult situation that helps.

[nico88]

The fact that your boyfriend loves you enough to love this child who isn't even his says a ton about his character. That takes a real man to do that. I'd listen to what anya_may21 says and talk to a therapist or a counselor. You and your boyfriend both. It'll help a lot now and for the future when you have the baby.

Ps. It takes a lot of guts to come clean to your partner about something like this..most women would lie and tell them it was their baby. Good for you, for doing that.