How to get out of a mentally abusive relationship?

[SadGirl22]

Ok this is a sad one and probably long as hell but here it is :/, ihave been dating this jerk for a LONG time, we meet 2-3 days a week n go on dates,he rushed me into sex,took my virginity& always forced me into sexual acts & when i started asking for commitment/future after sometime, he freaked. He has physically hurt me many times, dragged me out of his car during fights. He always makes excuses to not talk or spend time with me so if we talked we'd argue, hes never interested in wht i have to say, only sex interested him but we still spent time and I enjoyed going on dates & was in love. Worst thing is,he kept me a secret from his family because he's a muslim and not allowed to date but since its been years, i insisted him to tell his family now or its over. So he finally unwillingly told his mom, as expected she straight up said NO as Im not a muslim & that makes me an alien & it's insulting to their family & tht she never wants to hear of me again, my bf just stayed quiet, didnt even try convincing her or anything(i heard this over the phone myself) i cried & today,during a fight over this, he told me he didnt convince his mom about us coz I wasnt worth it just because I always fight with him but the fights r always about him not taking me seriously etc.He is a coldhearted jerk whos obviously looking to settle down with a woman of his religion/mom's choice later. Hes manipulating me coz he says he loves me but on the other hand, he is like this. I am really mentally frustrated & confused, I always put much effort n importance to him. I like to believe he loves me but the bitter truth is he doesnt. Everyhing we had was only for fun, I was nobody but a bootycall. M really hurt, I've told him to stop contacting me but he keeps texting me about wht my faults were. I just want to block this jerk completely, he is destroying my life and has already destroyed too much. How can I get this jerk to completely stop contacting me and myself to avoid contacting him?? Its unfair for me if i let him keep using me so I need to stop this I felt like he loved me.. but maybe I was wrong coz Ive never been in love before & seen most relationships not work so I thought me and my bf were just passionately in love at the begining, it was thrilling/exciting, it's true I found comfort, fun with him because I dont hang out with anyone else. Somehow, I just liked being with him even tho he never gave me importance & always put me on the side & if i fought for a commitment or his time, it becomes chaotic like this! But I must avoid him at any cost now and have him stop using me like this! Ty for reading/suggesting x

[cr62269]

You love the idea of love. your so busy trying to win him over that you have not stopped to concider yourself important. Some of us (women) are more susseptable to this than others. I am a little bit like you so I can feel your pain. You do need out. He is not good for you. He does not love you and can not love you the way you want to be loved. Muslems can have many wives. As many as they can afford in most prodominantly muslem countries. To them, women are not equals so he will never see you that way. His culture is one that it will be difficult for you to understand. If I were you, I would make myself accountable to another female that you trust. Mother, sister, aunt... grandmother (they are often smarter than they look). Tell them how you feel and give them permission to interfere. But remember you cannot get mad at them. I think you are going to need someone to help you pull yourself out of that mess. His abuse is a completely different subject from his culture. If it progresses (the abuse) I would look into some sort of women's shelter. These shelters often have the local police force on speed dial and are used to dealing with domestic violence. I had an abusive husband back in the 1980's. The situation gets somewhat adictive. Not that you like it. Not that at all, but the beat me up and then tell me you are sorry and that you love me cycle is hard to break. write back if you have questions.

[Liz1234]

You are a lady. You deserve to be treated with respect and love. A real man does not force you to do something you don't want to do. A man who loves you will respect you and treat you with a lot of love. A real man does not physically abuse his girlfriend . You will find real love one day. You may love him, but you should always love yourself more. Leave him now. There is no excuse. Do not think of the good times, but of the reason of why you are hurt. If you do take my advice and leave him, yes, you will have doubts and you will be sad at times. But you have a long life and you have faced many obstacles. You will get over him and this obstacle. You are strong. You will find someone who will truly love and care for you. End this miserable relationship.