Sticky Situation...

[complicatedmuch]

Hi, new here so please be nice

Basically... I have a friend who I had become very close to and know we both had feelings for one another.

Long story short... we are both married, used to work togther and both have issues with our marriages.

We started to get to know one another better around 2 years ago as friends and kind of hung out. Started to flirt and then I was asked to the xmas do... I declined at first but the invites were there... as was the flirting... to the point that it was obvious what we both wanted.

Anyways I went.. nothing happened as she got very drunk... but we remained close friends and joked about it. We again discussed both our problems in great detail with one another.. in out of work and both agreed that we got on with one another...

I was then mentioned in passing by her friends who all made fun of our relationship and how close we were... again we both carried on and continued as friends. We still confided in one another etc. Was always said by her friends that we look great togther and it was no secret that she showed her affection to me. Would by my chocalates etc.. was always asking about me.. always asking when I was off etc...

Then we were told our office was closing down and how things would change etc. All her closest friends know how she feels... and it was clear they knew about me and how she felt about me. I know everything about her and her personal life.. she tells me everything. She would always look at me.. have her tops open... play with her hair... go red when I walked in... constantly carress her legs when Im around.. her friends all joked about me and her.

So again.. long story short.. we had a leaving do.. and we ended up talking and she said how things would be different if she wasnt married and I wasnt etc.. and how crap our lives were.. and I hugged her.. and then we kissed.. several times... no sloppy kisses.. genuine long kiss which I know was affectionate... not slimy groping etc..

She text me the next day to see how I was and I said fine but it was apparant she ended up elsewhere too.. later ringing me in the early hours of the morning but I never picked up as I was asleep.... and when spoke and she told me how important I was and how she would never hurt etc.. just very very drunk which she was by the end of the night... and how important her family was and how she hoped we could put it behind us as she said somethings about me to others on the night which I wasnt happy about... such as he tried it on with me.. which really hurt me.. and our conversation in the following days were that I said I cared about her and always wanted to be in touch with her.. she said too that she wanted to remain close friends and that this should be put behind us and both agreed.

Anyways.. we hadnt spoke for a few weeks.. we are facebook friends but she doesnt do much.. im a facebook whore! I ran into her husband and things dont look any better but I text her asking how she was..

We exchanged a few messages and she asked if I was ok and if anything had come up but then signed off with take care with several thumbs up and I replied you too.

Is this the end? is she asking me not to keep in touch? I would appreciate your thoughts. Ill add that this is a very private person, long term marriage and does not confide in anyone. I dont think she uses take care in messages... and again I am one of few close friends... but I am genuinely worried I have lost her as a friend a really close friend as a result of this which is what I was scared off despite my feelings for her and her for me.

[dontaskme]

Have some respect for your spouses. If you both are not happy, file for divorce but stop with the flirting for crying out loud. In my book, you are both disrespectful people who do not deserve the love of your spouses! And you should not remain friends! You have feelings for each other. What is wrong with you? Are you a teenager or are you not capable of being plainly rational???

[complicatedmuch]

You've misunderstood I'm sorry, I've lost a friend, a close one by the looks of it which I am genuinely gutted about.

[michelle23]

You were having an emotional affair which is just an escape from the problems your having at home. Instead of turning your attention away from your wife, your supposed to turn towards her and try to fix the issues. You married her, made a vow of commitment and promised to do whatever it takes to make it work but now you are being weak, cruel, selfish, dishonest and degrading/disrespecting your wife and kids.

The other woman is just a fantasy. If you were living with her, mortgage, kids, routine etc you would have the same issues your having now. Its called life. You need to grow a pair and get your priorities straight.

Either end the marriage with dignity and integrity or get counselling to try and make it work. This woman is not the answer and you need to cut her off regardless of whether you separate or not. Again grow up and be a man