Boyfriend wants space - week no contact.. advise please

[HelloPeople]

Hi,

I need some advice please, or rather just to read something that will put my mind at ease. My bf and I have been together for a year now, and of course we have had our ups and downs during that period. However about 6 months ago we had "space" then as well for a week with no contact, this was when he lost his job he said he didn't know what he wanted in his life so wanted a break. Back then because our r/s was newer there were a few more issues (that have since been resolved and no longer linger). He ended up staying with me and we worked through things, while things progressed and got better..

Now..
He lost his job again and is feeling very down and lost in his life due to this. Suddenly he became very evasive with contact, and blunt.. He then called and said we need space a week apart with no contact (we don't live together).

He said he doesn't know what he wants to do in his life anymore, I asked what about us? He said that he doesn't know the answers to anything and to stop pushing for answers. I said ok well I love you and i'll talk to you later then.. he said he does love me too and care about me.

Please can somebody tell me that he is just doing this out of being stressed, and overwhelmed with his life right now.

I asked if it was anything I was doing that caused this and he said "no your perfect"..

It hurts so badly freaking out and not knowing if he is contemplating ending things with us.

Thanks..

[Jffs24]

I think he wants out of the relationship, you should have asked him point blank if that is what he was getting at with asking for space. Normally you stick closer to your bf or gf because of their unconditional love in times of need or stress so you don't feel alone or abandoned you don't request space from them. Is he leaving town for his needed space or staying in your city?

[woody]

Okay, well first off, sorry your enduring this. While I agree with part of what Jffs says, if your man has lost work twice and working is important to him, he could be uber fragile right now. You know, ultra sensitive and feeling down, exposed if you will.
Could be he needs this space so you can't see him when he's so down.
Only you'll know if his actions are the actions of a man who wants out and can't figure out how to say it so he avoids or the other thing, what I mention above.

Offer the space. Don't be needy. (not saying you are) step back and see how this plays out. Maybe some time away will offer clarity. Either way, you should focus on your self. Be strong, remember who you are

[fearoflove]

His life is overwhelmed and he is shutting you out? This guy has horrible communication skills and frankly, wouldn't make a good life partner. Tell him that he can have his space and if he wants someone to hang out with you, you will be there for him. Then, get busy with other things in your life.

[Jffs24]

So...... ??? Did he ever tell you why? Always wonder why people make threads to ask for help or insight and never return.

[ab3]

I'd say to give him space. Sounds like he is going through some stuff and is depressed, however mildly. Some people take it personally. It could be he just needs to clear his head - two types of guys: 1. a guy that leans on his chick and wants her support to get him through the difficult time, and 2. a guy that goes back into this shell because he just needs to sort his head out on his own. On the other hand it could just be an excuse because he is not happy with you, but since I don't know the guy personally I could not comment. But what I would say is give him his space because pressuring him usually just pushes guys away further. But do keep your face known by popping in every now and then to let him know you care.

AB3

[hoxtonchris]

he is probably finding out if he would rather be single and therefore not worry so much about income,he could be thinking of new start in new city,,,wait a bit then ask him outright.

[jere]

I would say he does want out, he just doesn't want to hurt your feelings, so he says that "no you're perfect!", and/or maybe he really does care for you, but he just has lost interest and tries to find a way to end things quietly, like creating that distance between you two.

[SummerNight]

I think he might be having a low self-esteem type of situation atm. He might think that he is a looser that he lost his job and thinks he doesn't deserve you or smth. If the job was very important to him then this could be a real reason.