confused, not sure how to express my feelings

[summerrae240]

I'm trying to figure out exactly how to express my feelings to my recent boyfriend. We have hung out/dated just as a friend with benefits relationship for the past year on and off. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship with a very controlling jealous ex. I told this new guy I wasn't ready for a relationship, Ive never really been single for very long. I wanted to take time to try and find myself and figure out who I am and what I want at the start. And he has 2kids and an ex wife That split up a year ago. About 3 weeks ago, we made it official that we were exclusive. I thought I was ready, thought that I would be happier with a partner. But I think I w as just lonely and naive that it would do that for me. He's a great guy and hadn't pressured me into anything. I felt he deserved a commitment from mr. But I feel like I'm falling into old patterns, feeling obligated to see him every day Etc. I realized I enjoyed not being accountable to anyone but myself. to go out when I wanted or stay home. I have been tempted to cheat as well, because I'm not satisfied sexually. I know that's superficial tho. I did not do that bc i don't want to hurt him obviously....how do I tell him I care for him but my mindset just isn't ready for a relationship and settling down to family life at 24yrs old. Do I just be honest and break it off completely. I'd like it to go back to the way it was before. It's not fair to him that I have these feelings and doubts tho. I feel stupid for agreeing to it. He doesn't deserve an emotionally unavailable person

[lissa]

Be honest and end things completely. He might be willing to go back to the way things were before but that's not fair to him.