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Thread: Found out my bf is on anti-depressants and want to know why

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2015
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    Found out my bf is on anti-depressants and want to know why

    I've been with my bf for about 15 months, and he moved in with me a few months ago. Things are going really well between us and I love him very, very much.

    I always thought that he'd been open to me about everything. I never felt like he kept secrets from me, so I always felt very comfortable. He has quite a few medical issues, and he told me about them fairly early on (within the first month of us being together).

    However, just last week, I found that he has been actively taking Prozac. (I was looking for some antihistamines, and ran into a pill bottle of his--it's a generic, but the bottle says right on there that it's a replacement for Prozac.) He has a few bottles, and a new one of refills, so I know he's actively taking them.

    He never told me about this. Never told me about any depression or other mental issues.

    Mentally, he doesn't behave in a way that suggests that he has depression. (Maybe the Prozac helps, or maybe the Prozac is for something else.) However, now that I know, I see that he does exhibit a lot of the side effects that I read about--waking him during the night, bad dreams, and decreased libido.

    I honestly don't have a problem with this, but I'm a little concerned about why he never told me. I can understand that some people don't like to talk about depression, mental issues, etc. But sometimes he would talk at great length about the depression of his friends, and he never once brought this up. Also, we had talked about his lower-than-normal libido, and he had told me that it was because of his other medical issues. Maybe that's true, but surely prozac probably had an effect too, and he never told me.

    So I really feel like asking him about this--NOT to confront him about not telling me, but I just want to understand what he's going through. I don't want to have this cloud over me. However, I don't know how to approach the subject, and I don't know if he would be uncomfortable/offended by me bringing it up. (On the other hand, I can't really unsee what I saw, and just forget about it.) I know this might be a sensitive topic, so I do want to make sure that I approach it with caution.

    So what do you think I should do?

    Thanks for any advice!

  2. #2
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    I'm not much good at being tactful, so the best I can say is what I'd do in the same situation: "hey, I found this while I was looking for antihistamines. I didn't know you have depression" Then leave how much he shares up to him.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  3. #3
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    You live with him. I suggest you stop feeling that you need to walk on egg shells and just do what Basil suggests.
    Its not like he was actually hiding them from you... Unless of course you generally keep your antihistamines in the back of his sock drawer.

  4. #4
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    May 2015
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    hi!

    It's a serious problem. It's not easy. But you know what if you are ok with this then just be patient and don't say anything. You can be more supportive and when the time will come I'm sure he'll let you know. This is your opportunity to be closer to him. At one moment maybe he will share this with you. Till then just remain noble as you are and be there for him rather than bringing it up and annoying him.

    Guys are not like girls and vice versa. They need to feel strong and that you can lean on him. He's already told you that he's sick and probably doesn't have the heart to share more. Nothing against you. It's just a guy thing I presume. They do the silliest things to probe that they are men. So yours has actually taken a huge step by sharing some of his health issues and when the time comes I'm sure he will tell you the rest. I hope you two get through this in short of time.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I thought I posted but I'll post again

    I think that it's not easy to share illnesses specifically for guys cause they want to be there for us. So just be supportive and the time will come and he lol let you know.

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