Why is my ex friend requesting me but not communicating?

[yoyobabe01]

I dated a guy for a while a couple of months ago. He treated me very respectfully and we literally clicked instantly, like 3 dates in the first week. He decided to move to another state to start a new life and job but he did not even mention trying to make it work so I did not want to mention it and sound desperate. I decided to break up with him because the thought that we could grow closer and suddenly it would be done without very little notice, it was a constant thought in my head so that is what I decided versus having a monogamous casual relationship.

After we broke up, I went back on tinder (which is where I met him). His friend told him and he texted me and made a comment about it. I told him I had to move on and that he didn't try hard enough to keep me. The one thing he said was that he wishes I find someone who will treat me amazing, but as we knew we had to break up, I told him I did not want to find anyone else because I was happy then. To this day, I have not been on a Tinder date since him.

Over the next few weeks we did random texts about our lives. he finally told me he accepted a job and when I asked if he wanted to hang out before he left to let me know but he never did. After a while I realized that I needed closure so I de friended him off of facebook and it felt like a huge weight was lifted off of my back. He initially friend requested me when we started sleeping together.

After not hearing from him for nearly a month, randomly I got a friend request from him. I decided to accept it but after not getting any way of communication (other than being a Facebook friend) from him, I de friended him again. I did not think it is fair for him to see my profile but not talk to me. I had nothing to hide but still it could not be all about him. After a week or two later, he friend requested me AGAIN for the second time! For a while, I kept it as pending, but then accidentally I deleted it. What is going on?

Inside, I would like to hear from him again, because I do miss him, but I do not want to be the weak link because he is stringing me along by not communicating with me, but somehow keeping tabs on me.

[basilandthyme]

First up, you don't have to be friends with him if you don't want to.

That being said, I think your expectations of him on Facebook are too high. Do you expect all your FB friends to message with you? I'm guessing that it's unlikely.

Most of us have many 'friends' on FB who we don't message. But we don't get all weird about them seeing our photos but not messaging. I have about 300 'friends' and frequently message with just one: my best friend. The rest of the time all friends just do occasional likes and comments on photos and shares.

I think this issue is not so much about Facebook for you. Delve further into your feelings.

[yoyobabe01]

But would you want your ex to see your posts?

[basilandthyme]

But would you want your ex to see your posts?

You wrote that you unfriended him because it was unfair that he could see your profile but not talk to you. You mentioned nothing about not wanting him to see any of your updates. These are two completely different issues.

What is the actual problem?