Long distance problems

[rachie10]

I'm in the uk and my bf is in Saudi, we've been together about 2 years. We recently had a holiday to Mexico which was fantastic but he came out with " I will never work back in the uk" to a couple who we were talking to. And this was news to me!! Obviously I've never expected him to move back home any time soon, but to say that to complete strangers was a total shock. I don't know what to do now because I don't want to live and be on my own for the next 30 odd year and want more children (I have a son from a previous relationship)
Any advice would be a great help

[Lilly328]

Did you asked him if he was serious about what he said?

[TheEvilJester]

I guess you two need to have a more serious discussion about that, then. Have you had a discussion, yet, as to where you two see your relationship going? It may have just been too early for that before, but obviously now you need to talk. If you two have any chance of a serious relationship, obviously that has to eventually involve one of you moving closer to the other, or both of you moving together. Also, obviously the eventual goal would be for you two to live together.

So, if it turns out that you do not ever see yourself moving away from the UK, but he never sees himself moving TO the UK, then obviously that is a problem. Then, maybe you two are just not the right match, despite how great everything else between you two may or may not be. I wouldn't say there should be any hard feelings if that DOES turn out to be the case. I doubt either of you entered knowingly into a relationship that wouldn't work out. The long distance thing didn't seem a problem at the time, so you hadn't really discussed it.

I understand how you may feel. It would be a shame if distance is what would end a relationship that was otherwise great, but you can't have a serious relationship from a long distance. At least not unless there is a foreseeable end to the long distance situation.

Good luck to you.

[rachie10]

Thanks for the replies!! We've talked about it today (well as much as you can via texts) and his response was he won't work away forever and the 2 years we've been together have flow past! Didn't get much more out of him, he's not one for expressing his feeling etc

[Wakeup]

Thanks for the replies!! We've talked about it today (well as much as you can via texts) and his response was he won't work away forever and the 2 years we've been together have flow past! Didn't get much more out of him, he's not one for expressing his feeling etc

Then ask him again what exactly are his plans. You need to know what HIS plans are because clearly he doesn't care much about yours.

[nheeya]

It's really hard to work a long distance relationship.

[TheEvilJester]

Agreed with Wakeup. I don't know about you, rachie10, but I don't know what the heck he means in that message. What does he mean he won't work away forever? What does "away" mean exactly? Because right now he LIVES "away" as far as you are concerned. Not only that, but you've heard him say to others that he'd never want to move where you currently live. So, again, how exactly would that ever work out unless you have no problem moving to where he lives instead?

So, as Wakeup said, you need to know what his plans are, and you need to share with him yours as well. If the two don't match, then unfortunately that may be your answer. Or, maybe you two actually can come to a solution that makes you both happy. You won't know if you don't try. If you are looking for something that could become serious, why waste your time if it turns out this cannot, even if only due to distance? Good luck. I hope it works out for you.